LUNATIC

Chapter 9

           

Milano, 1480

"Time is relative, its only worth depends upon what we do as it is passing." Albert Einstein once said, nevertheless, in my personal opinion it is not what we do but the moment we find ourselves trapped in, independently of what we do to avoid certain moments they usually catch up to us without the minor warning. There was a moment earlier today that stopped time for me, as I observed his skin, that seconds before was under my fingertips, disappear under a white shirt. He tortures me slowly, covering his body with the clothes I struggled not to rip off of him, turning my pain into a more depressing novel, the kind of novel you cannot get rid off after you have read it, but that you know you will never open again, letting it on the shelves, covered in dust, forgotten and yet never forgiven. And my own body covered with the wet sweaty sheets of what is left of a possible 'us', turning cold like the dying remains of a tree that was burning and we tried to save with cold water; even though the tree died you still have something to preserve, its roots, the question does not lay upon how much you enjoyed laying under its shadow but upon how fit you are to preserve its livelihood, you did let it burn once and you will have to fight harder to see it grow after the damage that you have done.

"You could come with me." He said once he reached for the door, stopping with his hand before the wooden door handle.

"Come with you?" My cynical laugh sounded as cold as I started to fell. "And stay trapped in the shadows as you get lost in a high-class social lie with someone else? Building a family and having children with your new wife while I stay under covers at your disposal."

"I thought family and children was something you never wanted."

"I had a family once, my mother deserted me because I went against her to protect my brother and I've been alone ever since, but when I met you... when I felt included in something and seeing all the good we could do together... well, I admit I felt prepared for something behind my previous expectations, something I could call my own..."

"Even so," he finally turned to me, I could see my own pain in his eyes, reflected back at me, trapped in an endless loop. "We could never be together publicly, people would never accept it."

"Since when does the great Leonardo                 need public acceptance? For as long as I know that is only one person that needs to accept a proposal." His eyes opened wide with surprise and I left the bed, moved by forces that I still don't understand, not giving myself time to second guess I walked towards him, smiling without a care about what the world has to say about my feelings or how doomed we can be over matters of our own, and that is love, if I would dare to define it. I kneeled in front of him and laughed slightly when his head started to turn from one side to the other as he struggled to say no to something he cannot run away from. "You are the love of my life Leonardo, please don't lose yourself in a simple life, stay with me and fight by my side."

"To keep fighting would mean to die." I smiled as he said those words.

"Not to fight is to be dead."

He fell on his knees in front of me and kissed my mouth, passionately and all of a sudden neither me nor the bed felt cold anymore.

Milano, 1475

A being older than time is destined to have a hard time among humans that even after more than 50 years alive might seem as if they were only born yesterday, through the passing of time I have seen numerous people start walking, saying first words, all the way to giving their last steps and saying their last words. Almost a thousand years after falling, I have settled myself in Italy, their intellect and social parties have seduced me. With my powers I have made a life for myself, ignoring my past between my simple and dull new life in society, a good entertainment, and distraction from my depressing existence.