Warning : mentions of depression, anxiety, abuse and suicide. Read with caution.
Y/N's POV
I hate my life. I hate having to try to stop myself from having panic attacks every other day. I hate my physical appearance. I hate that I hate my physical appearance. I hate myself for ending up with demons.
I'm watching Stranger Things when I hear the front door open. Dylan's finally home.
"Baby?" I hear him call out. I stand up and turn around to see my fiancé. I walk up to him and hug him tight.
"Finally," I whisper. He chuckles as he leans down and kisses me. I don't deserve him.
"I missed you," he says. I let go of him and walk to the kitchen to start dinner. He goes to our room to unpack his stuff.
"Hey these drawings are amazing Y/N!" He calls out from the room. I sigh. He's probably only saying that. He probably thinks it's disgusting.
"Thank you babe," I respond.
***
Dylan's out with a few friends. He wanted me to go but I didn't feel like dressing my ugly body up and going out.
I take a shower. While the water is running, I stare at the scars I gave myself. I sigh. I wish I had this under control. Every time I think I have it under control, depression and anxiety gang up against me. Screaming in my face, "Haha! You really think you can get rid of us?"
I finish my shower and get into a sweatshirt and sweatpants. The only thing my body can rock without having Dylan find out what I'm doing.
I text Dylan.
Y/N: hey baby. you having fun??
Dylan: hey beautiful! nah I miss
you too much... :(
Y/N: im sorry :(
Dylan: don't worry about it love
💕💕
I'm such a burden. Why does he put up with me? I'm sure he only says he loves me because he's sorry for me.
***
I hear the doorbell ring. I had just finished another drawing. I open the door to see Y/E, my ex.
"Still gorgeous as ever," he mumbles.
"What are you doing here?" I ask him.
"I love you Y/N," he says bluntly.
"No you don't. I was just a toy to you until you threw me out of your life," I mumble.
"Well I want your love again," he says, walking closer to me and shutting the door behind him. He pushes me against the wall.
"What are you doing?" I whisper. My eyes begin to well up.
"Y/N do you want pizza?" I hear Dylan call from the room. Y/E presses his lips against mine. Before I could push him away, I hear Dylan walk into the living room.
"What the hell?" He raises his voice. Y/E immediately pulls away and tears roll down my cheeks. No.
"Y/N dear who's this?" Y/E says. I turn to see Dylan. His eyes are welled up and his usual beaming face is scrunched up in a scowl.
