Brad's Angel

6: He Cares? About Me?

I lay on the bed, tossing and turning.

Whatever I tried, sleep would not come for me.

So I just lay there... Quietly sobbing to myself.

But I felt kinda pathetic. Surely they wouldn't want me to cry myself to sleep every night.

So I tightly squeezed my eyes shut and waited for sleep to come, but as I lay there, I heard a faint knock on the door.

"Hey Dee. It's James. Can I come in?"

I slowly got up and unlocked the door to see a topless James looking at me in concern.

I hate this... When people look at you like your a 5 year old who just fell off their bike! I don't need sympathy, I don't want sympathy...

I sat down on the bed, resting my back against the headboard.

It didn't take long for James to join me.

"Dee. Please tell me what's wrong. I'm really worried..."

"Okay James... Just get ready to deal with me having a meltdown yea?"

"I'm always ready to listen to you Dee..."

As every single memory resurfaced, more tears broke through the barriers... I didn't care whether I looked pathetic... Because James never judged me... No matter what problems I had.

"Oh Dee. I'm so sorry... Why didn't you tell me?"

"I just- I thought if I told too many people, it would be true... By not saying it out loud, I can imagine them at home... Like they didn't go anywhere... Like nothing ever happened..."

I couldn't carry on... I swear I must have woken up the boys with my sobs, but for the first time in a month, I truly don't give a fuck...

I used to be carefree, but I learnt the hard way that carefree doesn't always end well...

I had it give it to him, James was fucking amazing! I mean he is up at what? 4 in the morning holding me close while I sob into his chest... It just shows who my real friends are when hard times appear...

"Dee?"

"Yea?"

"I need to get back to sleep, I've got work tomorrow. Do you want me to get Brad to stay with you?"

"Erh, isn't he asleep?"

"Erm... I don't think he's actually gotten to sleep yet. He kept asking if you were alright. I think he likes you Dee..."

"Really? Wow. Only you worry about me that much Jems! But I think I will try to get to sleep."

James kissed my forehead as he stood up and pulled the duvet over me.

"Goodnight Dee."

"Night James. And...thank you..."

"Don't worry about it. You know I'm here when you need to talk alright?"

"Yea..."

The door finally closed and I was left in darkness.

But as I shut my eyes, I finally found myself drifting off to sleep...

With the biggest smile on my face...