Lost Love

Chapter 15

This chapter is kinda different from what I have been doing but I just wanted you guys to have an insight on what Chris feels about this whole thing so this Chapter will be all about Christian. Enjoy.......

Chris pov......
Looking at Charlie in the middle of the dancing floor as that song came on, I was entranced...she is really beautiful. The song brought out my feelings for her on a whole new level.
I am in love with her. The way she looked at me showed me a lot; she loves me so much and the emotion swirling in the depths of her eyes was unmistakably love.
Just seeing her showing me so much made me feel so guilty and I planned to tell her. I was so wrong to let my anger take over my thoughts and committed a grave mistake which hunted me for the past one year.
As the song ended a new wave of determination found its way to me and I knew without no doubt that I needed to tell Charlie the truth.
When I said I loved her, I really meant it. We walked to the garden away from the music and everybody so we could have a moment's peace and I would be able to tell her without any distraction.
She must have sensed my distress because she turned to look at me with questioning eyes. As much as I wouldn't want to tell her so she wouldn't be hurt, I couldn't handle not telling her because that was hurting her even more.
As I struggled with the words to tell her, her phone rang cutting me off unexpectedly. I'm guessing that was her dad with the way her face lit up instantly. She made a motion with her hand to tell me she was coming back.
I felt so uneasy; this was the girl that had opened up to me letting me into her life and here I am about to break her heart with this terrible news.
As I waited for her to come back, I felt the bench shift under the weight of someone sitting down on it
I looked up and saw Emily smiling at me. She reached up to me and kissed me slowly. With all thoughts of Charlie gone from my mind, I kissed her back. I was caught up in my little make out session with Emily that I totally forgot about Charlie.
The sound of shattering glass pulled me out of my reverie and seeing different emotions swirling in Charlie's eye one of which I recognized strongly as hurt was enough for me to peel myself away from Emily who was struggling to adjust herself.
I was at lost for words and for minutes, no one said anything. This situation was painfully awkward but I wasn't ready to break the silence. This was the girl who had let me into her life, someone I claimed to love and yet I cheated on her with none other than her best friend. I felt so ashamed of myself but just seeing her standing there in shock forced me to say something.
"This isn't what it looks like". As soon as those words left my mouth I regretted it because immediately Charlie's shocked expression gave way to a really angry one. That statement just made me feel foolish. I now sounded like one of those useless guys. Like seriously she just caught me making out with her best friend- someone she considered as her sister and all I'm saying is that its not what it looks like??? Not even an apology???
I reached out to hold her but she inched further away from me, I was hurt. I wasn't used to her rejection as she always allowed me calm her down. I had really fucked things up.
She looked really angry and she asked a question I'd rather not answer because I was already ashamed of myself. When Em told her we'd been doing this for a year, she was broken. I looked at her face that showed how she was trying to reason it out.
"When djd this start?" Her voice was a whisper and I could tell she was trying really hard not to break down
My answer was the last straw as she broke down crying.
I remember how it all started like yesterday.....

I was really angry at Charlie. How could she forget our first year anniversary; this was the girl that reminded me about our every month anniversary so how could she forget this. The logical part of me told me to calm down but my emotional side was freaking out mostly becauseof what I had planned out for the day.
I have been in love with Charlie since I set my eyes on her in 1st year. I had given her gifts sending her chocolates and love notes but she never noticed me. I gave up a little while because I couldn't approach her directly as she made me a mumbling mess anytime I'm around her and she never seemed to notice my efforts. In our 2nd year I finally got to ask her out and our relationship was perfect; we always made sure to settle our little quarrels and I got to meet her dad sometimes even going on dates with her family - her dad and Emily who she referred to as her sister.
I was so much in love with her that I decided to propose to her during our first anniversary. I had bought the ring and was really nervous. We had other plans before that day when she suddenly texted me a week before that she was going on a trip with her dad. I wasn't really happy with her but there was nothing I could do. I wanted to calm down before talking to her but I got really busy. Exams were coming up and I wanted to be prepared before our anniversary so I would be able to concentrate on our plans.
The day drew nearer and she sent me a text saying she would be staying gor an extra week. I was beyond angry, she didn't even act like there was a big event coming up for us. I ignored her calls right up to the time she came back. I avoided her and refused to reply to her texts. It was really obvious she forgot about our anniversary.
I was at home one hot afternoon when I heard a knock on the door. I tried hard to remember if I was having any visitors but came up with nothing.
I opened the door to reveal Emily in a short sundress exposing her long legs. Why was I even thinking about that? I opened the door wider to allow her come in.
She started talking about me avoiding Charlie and my anger came up again. She moved closer to me to calm me down and I explained what happened. When I was done, I looked up to see our faces extremely close and I caught a whiff of her perfume....she smells like vanilla I thought and that was it
We started kissing and things went really heated. We ended up having sex. We had this unspoken agreement between us so none of us told Charlie.
I made up later with Charlie and went on with our relationship like nothing happened.
I regretted what I did that afternoon but I couldn't just tell her. Truth be told, I was scared she was going to leave me. I avoided Emily like a plague and nothing else happened between us again till this night.
I had made up my mind to confess to Charlie when she answered her phone call from her dad. Emily came out of nowhere and now I am sure my relationship with Charlie is ruined.

I have regretted anything in life than that afternoon when it all started. If I hadn't been angry with Charlie, all of this won't be happening. I tried to get rid of the pain in my heart as I saw her look and Emily and turn away. Her tear striken face was an image imprinted in my heart.
I have hurt her... I broke down and started crying too repeating the words over and over again 'I am sorry' but she was long gone