Jet Black Hearts / l.h.

𝟏𝟒

Thursday, September 24, 2018
5:15 p.m.
Group Therapy Room

There's an extra chair and a new person in our circle today. His hair is black and he has an abundance of freckles dusting his face. His jawline could cut diamonds, and the glare he wears could kill.

He sits and watches us as though he wants to murder us all in our sleep. With his muscular arms crossed and his jaw locked, who wouldn't be scared of him?

Actually, I'm not. I bet he's just putting up a front, trying to be manly. He sticks out of our small group like a fish in a tree. We're a bunch of teenagers with depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and trauma. I don't know why he's here, but he doesn't seem to fit in.

Luke, sitting beside the new guy, fidgets in his seat nervously. Which is understandable. He looks like he could snap Luke in half without even lifting a finger.

"We've got a new comer!" Dr. Hunter exclaims in his chair. "Ian, why don't you tell us a little about yourself before we get started?"

He snarls, "No."

"Let's get off to a good start, yeah?" Dr. Hunter probes. "We're like family here; there's no need to hold back."

Ian laughs lowly and sets his elbows on his knees. He ducks his head and scratches his stubble growing on his face.

"No holding back, eh?" He sits back. "Fine. I'm here because I just got arrested for beating some guys up and dealing drugs, so they decided to send me here to talk about my feelings. They think this dumb shit is gonna teach me some lesson."

Luke scoots his chair away from Ian.

Dr. Hunter reads the paper on his clipboard. "I see here that your father mentally abused you."

"So what?"

Dr. Hunter pushes up his glasses. "So, you may think that you have nothing in common with anyone seated around you, but we all have problems. Some of the problems are completely different, but some are somewhat similar. For instance, Macy here has an abusive boyfriend."

"Had," the petite girl, Macy, pipes up. Her face goes red when she sees that she has everyone's attention. In a quieter voice, she says, "I had an abusive boyfriend. I broke up with Hayden on Tuesday."

Andrea claps and her face breaks out in a grin. Dr. Hunter beams, too.

"That's great, Macy. We can talk about that a bit later." He turns back to Ian. "We all have problems, and that's something we all have in common here. We're also all here to get better and grow. Just know that you are one of us now and that you can feel comfortable."

Steven raises his hand. "I smoke weed, so I kind of know how you feel about the drug-"

"Weed ain't nothing," Ian spits. Steven visibly flinches.

"We're not here to compete," Dr. Hunter intervenes. He goes on and asks the group some questions about our weeks, and as he's doing so, Luke and I make eye-contact. He smiles cheekily at me, and it takes me by total surprise.

What makes him want to smile so brightly? If anything, a frown is in order; he's sitting in a room with a bunch of challenged and difficult teens, plus he's sitting next to a massive guy who was arrested for fighting. So my question still stands: What does he have to smile about?

After the hour ends and everyone is exiting the building, I stop Luke in the lobby. I grab his tiny wrist and he turns and looks down at me.

"Why were you smiling?"

He blinks. "What?"

"You know," I say, nodding towards the door to the room with our circle of chairs. "When Doc was asking us about how our weeks were going, you looked at me, I looked at you, and you smiled."

He lets out a breathy laugh. "I was smiling at you, Brin." His eyes dart to the floor.

I just stand there and stare at him. My mind can't comprehend that he was smiling at me. Most people, if they even look at me or notice me, frown in my direction.

"Oh."

"Yeah." He opens the door at the front of the lobby. A sweet breeze drifts in as he holds it open for me. As I'm walking out the door, he asks, "Is your mom picking you up today?"

I don't even check to see if her car is parked before I reply. "No."