Peace of Mind

II

"Mr. Washington, you can't possibly expect me to get along with him- he made my life a living hell for years!" The moment that my worst enemy- or, rather, Alex's worst enemy, which basically made him mine- had walked into the counseling office, I had left as fast as I could, going straight for the restrooms.  There was no way I was sharing my feelings with Thomas Jefferson- he had no idea what I was going through. 

Mr. Washington stood in front of me, his mouth pursed into a frown as he glared at me.  I could tell he was disappointed, but I didn't care.  I glared defiantly back up at him, though I was sure that the effect was diminished by the seemingly-permanent red rings around my eyes.  

Washington sighed and crossed his arms.  "What did he ever do to you?"

I gaped up at him, my mouth dropping open slightly.  "What did he do?  What did he do?"  I shook my head in disbelief.  "He constantly made fun of Alex, fought with him every chance he had, spilled his secrets to the whole school-"

"But what did he do to you?"  Washington was annoyingly calm as I glared up at him.

"But, Alex-"

"Isn't you." Washington looked even more insistent.  "What. Did. He. Do. To. You?"

I opened my mouth to say something, anything, about what he had done to Alex when it struck me, the meaning of what Washington was saying.  "Oh."

The counselor relaxed slightly and leaned against the wall.  "What did Thomas ever-"

"Nothing," I interrupted, my voice soft.  "He did nothing to me.  But don't expect me to be all buddy-buddy with him."  I looked up at Washington.  "Okay?"

"Fine."

*   *   *

"John!"  I looked up from my locker and saw Peggy Schuyler walking toward me.  School had ended nearly twenty minutes ago, but I was re-organizing my books- again.  It was a good way for me to go back over my day.  

After I'd spoken to Washington, he had agreed to let me do individual counseling- but he did want me to give Thomas "another chance." I'd told him that I wouldn't promise anything.  

"John!" Peggy snapped her fingers in front of my face. "Earth to John!"

"What?" I blinked a couple of times before I looked at her.  "Oh.  Sorry."

She offered a gentle smile.  "There you are," she laughed.  "It's okay, I get it.  It's Monday and all that."

I gave her a weak smile.  "What's up, Peggy?"

Peggy and I had been best friends all through elementary and middle school, but in high school we had grown apart a bit.  Normally, she wouldn't come up to me if she didn't want something.  

She chewed her lip, looking a bit nervous.  There was a small pang in my chest as I watched her.  The old Peggy wouldn't have been afraid to talk to you.  I thought to myself, then frowned.  The old you wouldn't have anything that would make her afraid of you.

"Peg? Are you alright?" 

She ran a hand through her hair.  "I just wanted to make sure you were okay," she replied, and I stifled a sigh.  How the fuck would I be okay?  I was about to tell her that I was fine when she amended herself.

"No, not that," she muttered.  "I just- I'm here, okay?  When you need something?"  She looked down at her feet.  "I'm sorry," she added in a soft whisper.

I frowned, grabbing my bag from where I had left it on the floor.  "Thanks." 

I meant it.  I didn't know if she could tell, but I meant it.  I was sick of people saying that they were sorry, or they knew what was going on, or asking if I was okay, and then just disappearing.  I was grateful for Peggy offering her friendship. 

I closed my locker quietly, then looked over at Peggy.  Her eyes were on a paper taped to someone's locker, but I could tell that she had been watching me.  I smiled slightly. 

"Hey, Pegs... do you want to walk home with me?"

Her eyes flashed back to mine, suddenly bright, and a small grin flashed across her face.  "Really?"

She made me want to smile for the first time all day.  "Yes, really."

She nodded eagerly.  "Can I have a piggyback ride?"

I laughed.  I actually laughed, and it echoed through the hallways, causing me to stop and just tilt my head, listening to the brief echo.  "Anytime, Pegs." 

She grinned and hopped on my back and immediately started rambling about her sisters and this girl in her English class named Mary, or something like that, and I grinned, only half paying attention.  

Maybe I did have a friend at school, after all.