The wingman nobody asked for

Hey! What's got your hopes up?

"Waaaah! Amaaaaaaaamiiiiii-chaaaaaaaan!" Rantarou heard some distant crying as his friend ran into him, nuzzling his face in his chest. Rantarou could feel the fake tears stain his shirt. He sighed.

"What happened, Ouma?" He asked, not bothering to look down. Kokichi whimpered and looked up at him. "Lesbian-chan wants to kill me." He said, pouting his lips in innocence. Before Rantarou could ask further, he heard thundering footsteps go his way. The first thing he could spot was long, dark green, twin tails.

"Hand over the tiny degenerate. NOW!" Their classmate, Tenko Chabashira, commanded in a loud yell as she halted her steps. "Eeep! Amami-chan, it's lesbian satan! She's here to gobble me uuuup!" Kokichi cried out in staged agony. "Wait hold up. What happened?" Rantarou asked but Tenko stomped her foot in fury. "Why does that matter?! That tiny degenerate made Yumeno-san cry!!" She exclaimed. "Amami-chan, she's slanderiiiing meeee!" Kokichi continued to fake whine. Rantarou was truly in a pickle, he didn't know what to do.

He looked down at Kokichi. "Ouma, what did you do?" Rantarou asked sternly. "Papa, don't turn against me like this." Kokichi said, quivering his lips. "Are you doubting Tenko, you degenerate?! Do you want to be punched too?!" Tenko asked with annoyance. "No, not really. I'm just trying to grasp the situation before me." Rantarou calmly replied. Deep down, he was a little nervous. He really didn't want Tenko to punch him, especially not this early in the morning.

Right on cue, Kaede walked into the classroom. She had a huge smile on her face, her smile was bigger than usual. What got her so happy today? "Good morning everyone!" She cheered before her eyes fell flat at the sight before her. The scene turned silent as all three turned to face her. "Lesbian Satan is trying to kill me." Kokichi then whispered. "N-no! Tenko does not kill! S-she only punches misbehaving degenerates!" Tenko scrambled to justify. "I had nothing to do with this." Rantarou said plainly. Kaede kept silent before she felt an idea get to her.

"Chabashira-san, it's okay! Your work is appreciated but I can deal with him!" Kaede kept her smile as she spoke cheerfully. Tenko tensed up and almost blushed. She sure got weak really easily. "A-are you sure..? T-Tenko can really teach him a lesson..!" Tenko asked, clearly flustered. "Yes! So go ahead and cheer up Yumeno-san, I'm sure she needs you the most right now!" Kaede cheered and Tenko yelped. "O-of course..! T-Tenko will leave now.." Tenko said with a blush as she began to walk away. Of course, she didn't leave without giving Kokichi one last glare. Kokichi stuck out his tongue at her, clearly amused by how things went his way.

Rantarou sighed in relief and looked down at Kokichi. "You can let go of me now." He said. Kokichi faked a sniffle. "Not until you promise me I can touch your bf's butt at least once..." Kokichi whined. "Ouma, do you want me to hurt you?" Rantarou threatened. Kokichi replied by giggling and pulling away from Rantarou. Kokichi then turned his attention to the beaming Kaede. "Oi, what's got you feeling so high?" Kokichi asked with an amused smile. "Oh, nothing really! Just had a nice morning!" Kaede replied, her smile unphased. "How vague." Rantarou simply stated. Kokichi's amused smile then twisted into a mischievous smirk. "Is it Toujo-chan?" He asked. Kaede didn't reply. "Hey! What did you do? Did do something like peek under her skirt? Or touch her tiddie? Or tell her you—"

"I'm going to tell Chabashira-san that you're speaking badly of Yumeno-san again!" Kaede threatened, still smiling. Kokichi flinched. "Lesbians sure are scary. I was just curious sheeeeesh..." He said with fake fear. "So I'm guessing you're not going to tell us." Rantarou stated. "Nope! Just like how you didn't tell us anything!" Kaede cheered. "Ouch, didn't need to attack me." Rantarou replied, laughing a little. He knew that Kaede was only just joking and will surely spit it out sooner or later, especially with her current state. Rantarou could almost feel a pool of light shine from her with rather blinding rays.

"Akamatsu-chaaaaan! Tell us what happened already! You're really starting to annoy me!" Kokichi pouted as Kaede couldn't stop smiling all day. They were currently at lunch. Kaede didn't reply, her happiness made her speechless. Instead, she went on her phone. Kokichi peeked over and whistled. "You really did it." Kokichi noted. Kaede nodded with a huge grin. "I really did!" She cheered. "Looks like you're going to spill it." Rantarou said with an amused smile. "Well yeah! I mean, who wouldn't get all excited when their crush asked to hang out?!" She cheered. "Oh? So that's what it was?" Rantarou asked as Kaede nodded rapidly. "Congratulations." He said with a smile. "Yep yep! Congratulations Akamatsu-chan! You really did it!" Kokichi added. "Well, uh... I didn't actually do it, she was the one that asked me..." Kaede corrected after she managed to compose herself from her excitement. "Yeah but you accepted, right?" Rantarou asked. "Of course I did!" Kaede shot back. "Means you did something." Rantarou replied.

When the school day ended, they began to head to their bus stop. On their way to the bus stop, Kaede couldn't stop humming. "So when's the date?" Rantarou asked. "Saturday." Kaede responded. "Oh oh! Where to? I wanna come!" Kokichi cheered. "Nope!" Kaede replied cheerfully. Rantarou sighed. He wished he had that choice when he hung with Shuuichi that one day. Kokichi whined. "Are you prepared?" Rantarou asked. "Well, I already started planning ahead!" Kaede responded. "That's good. I wish you the best of luck on Saturday." Rantarou said with an encouraging smile. Kaede replied with a cheerful "mhm." As she nodded her head.

(A/N: once again, I'm SUPER sorry! I hope y'all don't mind the long waits for every chapter, I'm really trying my best.)