Two faced (Got7 ff)

10.

  Jackson: "Are you a virgin?"

  I immediately choked on the food I was eating at his sudden and abrasive question and started coughing like crazy.

  Mark: "JACKSON!"

  I felt Jinyoung's hand on my back rubbing it trying to calm me down as he gave me a glass of water to calm my cough attack.

  Jackson: "What? I am curious."

  He shrugged his shoulders like that was super normal to ask his sister after 6 years in a middle of a dinner with 6 strange guys in it.

  I drank my water and calmed myself down, when I put my glass down Jackson kept on looking at me waiting for an answer.

  Sophie: "No."

  I said as I put another piece of the fish in front of me. This time it was Yugyeom who choked on his food. Jackson's eyes got wide open and I knew I was about to get scold.

  Jackson: "WHAT?"

  I sighed and drank my water again.

  Jackson: "WAS IT WITH THAT JUNGKOOK?"

  I put the glass of water down slowly trying to remain calm.

  Jackson: "I AM GONNA KILL THAT GUY! HOW DOES HE DARE TO TOUCH MY LITTLE SISTER!"

  'Stay cool Sophie... Stay cool...'

  Jackson: "YOUNGJAE RUN ON HIS BACKGROUND! I AM GONNA KILL THAT LITT-"

  Sophie: "ENOUGH!"

  I threw my fork to my plate as I shout making Jackson immediately stop talking.

  Sophie: "NO ONE HIS CHECKING ON JUNGKOOK'S BACKROUND!"

  I screamed while looking at Youngjae while he threw his hands at the hair showing his innocence.

  Sophie: "YOU WANTED TO KNOW NOW YOU KNOW! AND YOU'RE NOT KILLING MY EX-BOYFRIEND!"

  I pointed a finger at him and grabbed my fork again hoping that the matter would end there.

  Jackson: "SO IT WAS WITH HIM!"

  Sophie: "YES FOR FUCK SAKE!"

  'I had to do it... my relation needed to look real'

  Sophie: "WHAT DOES IT MATTER JACKSON! YOU WEREN'T THERE! BACK THEN YOU WERE JUST MY DEAD BROTHER! SO EXCUSE ME IF I DIDN'T TOLD YOU WHO I FUCKED WITH. AND I AM SORRY I DIDN'T PRESENT MY BOYFRIEND TO MY BROTHER WHO ACTUALLY EVERYONE THOUGHT WAS DEAD!"

  I punched the table shacking a bit after that wave of anger making several plates and glasses shake. A part of me was still acting, but another was building that up inside. I got up from the table not letting anyone speak after me.

  Sophie: "I am not hungry anymore."

  No one dared to say anything as I left the dinning room and went to my own room.

  As soon has I entered and closed the door tears started forming on my eyes and I let myself slid through the wall until I hit the ground hugging my knees while tears fell from my cheeks.

  Sophie: "WHY AM I CRYING?!"

  I hit the ground angry at the fact that I wasn't being able to hide my emotions as I usually can. As I kept saying that question over and over again each time which a more weak voice as the tears and the sobbing took over me there was just one name and one face that kept appearing on my head. 'Jungkook...'

  Sophie: "I am not suppose to miss you... not like this..."

  I hit my head on the wall and then hid it on my knees to see if I could make the sobbing less loud but it was no worth. 'I tried so hard... so hard to put my feelings aside... I know I can never have a real relationship... my life doesn't alow it... I guess it was no use on putting them aside... because they are still here... after all, my feelings for that bunny were real... my happiness when I was with him... my sadness when I was not... my jealousy... everything was real... I kept on telling myself I was acting... but I wasn't... and I am now aware of that... I miss him... I loved him... I think I still do... Fuck... feelings are no good...'

  I hit with the back off my head on the wall once again frustrated with everything.

  'I can remember so well the smell of his perfume, of his breath on the morning when we spend the night together, the feeling of his warm skin against mine, I remember so well his bunny looking smile with the little mole beneath his lips and the other one on his nose..'
  I smiled to myself and laughed a bit remembering little details about him and about the memory's we made together. After some time doing that my head hurt for crying so much so I went to lay on my bed.

  As soon as I laid down someone knocked on the door and before I could say anything the door opened to show my brother looking at the ground not daring to lock his eyes with mine.

  Sophie: "You can go back now."

  Jackson: "Please listen to me Soph... you don't have to talk... just... listen..."

  I sat on my bed looking at him giving him the permission to continue.

  He sat at the edge of my bed and sighed.

  Jackson: "I am sorry Sophie... I wasn't the best brother... I know that..."

  Sophie: "Yeah. Something like that."

  He looked down again and continued talking.

  Jackson: "But I love you. I've always loved you for 22 years of both of our life's. I loved you since the day you were born. I know that at a point of our life's I started to distance myself from you, so much to the point that you though I was dead... I know that... and I am not proud of it... I know I hurted you... I know you needed me... and I know I wasn't there for you... and like I said before, I am sorry... but I had my heart on the good place... you have to know that... I just did that because I didn't want you to be near this world. But that was for nothing, because either way you're here now... So what I put you through wasn't worth it... putting you through that pain wasn't worth it... and even now that you're right here I can't protect you anyways, you've been shot... I am so sorry Soph..."

  As he kept on talking his eyes kept on getting teary, so much to a point that it all gave down and he started crying non stop, tears streaming down his cheeks making rivers on them, seeing my brother crying wasn't a thing I was used to, and even tho I was educated to not care, I did, I cared, he was my brother, I have the right to care about him, so I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him telling with that action that I wasn't angry anymore, he soon after hugged me back by grabbing my waist and placed his face on my neck crying on it not worrying about my now wet shoulder.

  Jackson: "I don't deserve you Soph... I love you."

  He said between sobbing.

  Sophie: "I love you too Jackson."

  My voice was sweet and calming even tho I had just been crying myself, but right now I just wanted to calm my brother down.