Hiya, Skyguy.

Morals of steel

Chapter 5

Ahsoka pov

I sat on the floor of the twilight cargo bay, watching the blue ripples of hyperspace drift past. I was doing a lot of thinking; I had been over the past few years. I thought about whether returning to the order was the right thing to do. I thought about the betrayal, how they didn't trust me, how they hadn't helped me. I had been lost and confused for so long. I was hurt. I didn't blame the clones, they were only following orders. Nor did I blame my master. He had tried to help me. I didn't even blame the council, sure they hadn't trusted me, but there had been so much evidence. I blamed the code and the darkness surrounding the republic. The code stopped attachments, and perhaps at times that was good, but when I was out there alone... I was truly alone. If the code had allowed Jedi to feel emotions, I would have had friends who trusted me and truly cared. I knew many Jedi had secret attachments themselves and I wanted to council to see the light in that. I promised myself that when I came back I would make a stand against this.

I sighed. But the republic was corrupt. We fight in a way that opposes the things we stand for. Yes, we save innocents and protect the vulnerable, but we also take life and don't combat the darkness we so fear. I was glad the sepatist troops were all droids; I wouldn't have been able to justify killing men. That was my new way, I would not kill if it was unnecessary, I would not fight if it was unnecessary, and I would serve only in defence of those who deserved it. That was the code I lived by. And I vowed within myself to remove those who had corrupted the code for the Jedi from power. Perhaps even kill them, but I would avoid that at all costs. I must not kill unless it is necessary and in defence. Never attack.

I scowled at my sudden mood swing and tried to pick myself up. It was so good to see my old friends again, and I would see more when I got back to the temple. I no longer felt conflicted. I had come to terms with what had happened and I wouldn't let it hurt me. I had the force now, and it held me strong and true. I knew this path was the right one. I just hoped it would remain that way.

I wandered back down to the bridge, I could sense we were nearing Courisant. As I entered, I saw Obiwan and Anakin talking to Master Yoda. The transmission ended moments after i walked in, but I didn't find it rude as I realised we were about to land. I looked through the windshield, and saw the tamale ahead of me. It had been a while.

We landed a few minutes after the temple came into view. When the shuttle came to a stop, I heard the ramp open in the back of the shuttle. My superior hearing unformed me that Rex got off almost immediately, and I could hear him speaking to someone. I would have reached out with the force to find out who but I knew that I would find out soon. Anakin turned to me, and smiled supportively. I knew he could sense my worry. I couldn't control it. This was it, my last chance to change my mind.

Memories of old times flashed before me, and I dropped to my knees shaking. Anakin was beside me in a second, placing his hand on my shoulder. He was talking to me, but I was too clouded to hear it. I shuddered a little more, before closing my eyes and asking to force to help me, to guide me. My prayers were answered. I felt a sudden strength and I gulped before standing and breathing in deeply.

"Sorry." I apologised a little embarrassed

Obiwan was the one who spoke "Don't worry young Ahsoka, I can't image what it is like to come back after such an ordeal. Take all the time you need to adjust."

He smiled and I smiled weakly back. It was time. I straightened my posture and nodded to Anakin. He placed a reassuring hand on my arm and smiled at me. I felt the waves of clam he was sending through he force. I turned to the doors, and opened them before walking down the ramp and onto the landing platform.