Kiss in the Rain

Phone Conversations: Lies Would Get You Nowhere

"Why?" He asked me as tears streamed down his face.

"I didn't mean to--- I was just--" I stuttered.

My heart is breaking. I can't see him like this. It's painful for me to see that I'm hurting him this way.

"You were just what? Lying to me?! Stop acting like you're the victim here!" He angrily shouted at me as he plopped down on the bed and put his face in his hands.

"Ethan, I'm so sorry..." I whispered. I knelt in front of him and tried to pry his hands away from his face. He shrugged them off.

I heard a sob out of nowhere. Then, I realized it was coming from me.

Ethan finally looked up then stared at me. His eyes were full of pain and anguish. I can't believe that this man, whom I thought before was cocky, arrogant, strong, independent and carefree, could be like this. All because of one stupid lie that I did to impress him.

I was hoping he'd reach out, caress my cheek, wipe my tears away and tell me that everything's gonna be okay, like what he always did when we fight; but, he didn't.

He stood and glared at me. Without saying a word, he walked away from me, leaving me alone, cold and empty.

I woke up panting and gasping for air. My body was covered in sweat and my hands were really cold. I scrambled to get up and drank the glass of water on top of my bedside drawer. Yes, a glass of water is at bay because I've been having the same nightmare for the past three months. Fuck, I got it bad. Ethan got me sooo bad. >.<

I tried to calm myself down as I searched for my phone, which was currently under my pillow. How did it get there anyways?

Oh, right, I fell asleep while talking to Ethan last night, AGAIN. I checked the time and it was 3:30 AM. Geez, I only had two hours of sleep. Curse you, Ethan.

There were two messages, one from Matt and one from, of course, ETHAN. I read Matt's text first.

Hey Lee-Lee! 'sup? I miss you... Wish you hadn't left..

Call me when you can.. x

Tears pooled in my eyes as I read it over and over again. I miss my Matt. I miss him so, so much and up until now, I still can't believe that I was able to leave him after making a promise that I wouldn't.

It has been four months since I vacated all of my stuff from Mooma's house. Yes, I did what I told her. I wanted her out of my life but because I'm sure that she would not do it herself, I'll just be glad to do it for her.

The morning after the incident of Mooma hitting Ethan with the bat and the spit fight between her and me, I started packing my stuff. I told Ethan a vague reason why I wanted to leave and luckily, he didn't ask me any further. I asked him if I could use his car in moving my things and he agreed. And since he cannot drive because of his injury, I did the honours.

It was 7 AM and I just helped Ethan get into the passenger seat of his car. My things were already loaded and we were all good to go. But as we were leaving, I was also fighting the urge to say goodbye to Matt.

I was already seated on the driver's seat and we were pulling out of the garage when Ethan snapped me out of my thoughts.

"Go to him."

"What?" I was startled, of course. I didn't know what he was talking about. Or, I was pretending not to know.

Ethan sighed then smiled at me thoughtfully. "Go to your best friend. I'm sure he really wouldn't appreciate the fact that you'll just suddenly disappear in his life."