𝙄𝙢𝙖𝙜𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙋𝙧𝙚𝙛𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙘𝙚𝙨 | Why Dont We [✔️]

River of Tears || J.M

Credit goes to idkseavey

warnings: angst, post-breakup, and sad reader/song lyrics

Song: "Fiver Of Tears" by Alessia Cara

Still got the flowers that you sent

And the note you wrote that said we're meant to be forever | I keep them all as evidence

In a drawer under the mirror, filled with empty promises

Scanning over the dresser, Y/N decided to clean out the drawers first. Y/N had decided it was time to move and get out of LA before it could hurt them more. Pulling out the third drawer, however, Y/N's breath hitched as they saw the drawer's contents. They had completely forgotten about the small box her ex had given her for a gift one time—a box full of memories of the two.

Part of Y/N told them no—they would only get more hurt if they looked. The other half, on the other hand, decided against it. Carefully, Y/N pulled off the top of the box and saw all of the trinkets, tickets, and things scattered all over. The most prominent were pushed towards the back corner—a dried up rose and a letter with faded writing. It was part of their gift from Jonah on their anniversary, a bouquet of flowers and a small note expressing his love for them.

Funny how things change in time.

I thought that you would be the hero

Come and save the day | But you're a villain

Your sins unforgiven

Y/N knew when their relationship with Jonah started going south. They knew that the band's rising fame, while good, would also cause trouble for the young couple. Y/N knew things would change, but they didn't know just how much. While they were always supportive, Jonah became less and less aware of Y/N's accomplishments and life. It's not that he meant to, but the band just seemed to come first.

And Y/N knew this too. The last straw, however, was when Jonah missed y/n receiving a prestigious award at their college. If he had paid any attention to y/n, he would've known how much arduous work and effort they had put in to achieve the award. Y/N had told Jonah it was one of their dreams to get this award. And he was nowhere to be seen when they accepted it. Not even a congratulatory text or call.

Y/N could take Joan missing the occasional date or two, but this was unacceptable. He knew how important that award and all her work and dedication to her project was to her.

Under the waves, I've found the strength to say

The river of tears has washed me clean

After that day, Y/N began to distant themselves from Jonah. Clearly his work meant a lot to him, so why bother getting in the way of that?

And while it may have taken many nights of tears, sleeping alone, and many fights, Y/N realized that the two were just not going to work out. Both wanted different things. And as unfortunate as it was, a breakup was for the better.

And I recall the love we had, I can't pretend

That I don't miss you every now and then | But the hurt is for the better | Moving on, it's now or never

As the days went on, Y/N slowly started to get over Jonah more easily. The thought of getting a fresh start soothed them. But not everyday could be a good day. There would be days where y/n got a notification about the band, a fan would comment something like 'where's y/n? we miss them!' on a post, or y/n would find one of the things Jonah forgot to get when packing up his things.

That's why Y/N was moving. After the breakup,  everything in LA seemed to remind them of their past relationship. It wasn't fair to y/n to keep torturing themselves everyday; it just wasn't healthy. They needed to get out and start over.

I'm over this, can't let memories become the death of me

Y/N put the cover back on the box. They didn't want to think about the past anymore. Y/N wasn't going to become the ex that was always going to sulk over the relationship; they refused. No, they were going to go back to being the strong person they always have been. While the past was nice, y/n wasn't going to let it ruin their future.

So I won't need you here |

Love sinks and hope floats

In a river of tears

When the day came to move everything out of the apartment, y/n was more than ready. As they looked back at the apartment one last time, y/n shed some tears as they realized what they were leaving behind. Quickly, the tears were wiped away as the moving people grabbed the last box and loaded it in the truck. Closing the door for the last time, y/n smiled softly to themselves, thinking about all the new memories that were to be made somewhere else. The past was in the past, along with everyone else; and the future seemed promising.

As y/n drove away, the apartment became smaller

and smaller—along with the one box still left in it.