"You know what I notice about you between then and now?" He asked me, looking through my old photographs, taken several years ago.
"What is it?" I asked curiously, wondering what he would tell me.
"You looked happier. You looked more lively, more cheerful. Life changed you that much, huh?" He said, still examining every curves on my face on the picture.
"Yeah? I guess. Yeah.. It is. I don't know. I used to be so dark and negative. I looked at the world ignorantly." I replied, reminiscing every pain that soaked my heart. Why do I talk about this to him? How is it possible to talk about this to someone? How is it possible that there is actually someone who understands? "But I'm not like that anymore. Not again, not will I ever allow it to enter and inhabit my mind again." I continued, trying to stop reminiscing those horrible feelings.
"Why do I talk about this to you?" I suddenly blurted, confused why I could talk about this kind of sensitive and irritating topic to someone. "How can you understand?"
His eyes on the floor, but he shifted his gaze to face me. "I can feel what you feel. And I know how you feel. I just feel you, you know?"
I thought he was just kidding, because no one would understand it. No one would understand how I feel. But he proved it wrong. He never judge. He never said that it is stupid nor it is ridiculous to feel that way. He agrees that it is something that should be concerned about.
"It is not stupid to feel that way. It is completely fine and human." I think he's able to read my mind too. I'm positive that I am no longer feeling that way anymore, but when I remember them, I could still feel every single pain on my heart.
"I don't know.. I just felt stupid. I never felt loved. I never think that I deserve to be either. I couldn't make myself happy. I wasn't myself. I have no idea who I was or even what I was feeling. I was completely numb." I have no idea how I could talk about this to someone.
There was a moment of silence. All I could hear was just the breeze brushes my hair and the sound of the tip of my hair tingling. "But trust me, I am okay now." I finally broke the silence and assured him.
"Maybe you felt that people don't love you, and you thought that the world rejects you and the whole world hates you. The truth is, it's all wrong." His stare was serious, and intense.
"But.... I felt like everyone hates me for no reason, and I thought that maybe people will be better off without me—"
"Hey," He cuts me off when I haven't finished my sentence. "I don't want you to feel that way again. Please."
I was about to shed a tear. Part of me still couldn't believe that this kind of guy really does exist, another part of me still couldn't believe that I am apparently loved. It left me in disbelief. All I could do was to stare straight, not able to look at him. But I could feel his stare at me. "I promise I won't leave you like everyone else did." Suddenly, his palms landed at the surface of my hand. "And I will make you the old you again." He continued, and smiled genuinely.
