Why Can't I Feel This Way

For Once

All rights reserved to whoever made this idea about gay being straight and straight being gay. And also these are not my characters they are Ryan Murphy's. If I make anyone offended or something please tell me. And heterosexual means straight, technically. Oh and if anyone thinks I am taking someone idea tell me who and I will give them credit. Enjoy:) By the way it's set where they are in high school.

Chapter 1

-Rachel-

All my life I've seen people marry and be happy but they were the same sex. And around here that's normal. The not normal thing is being heterosexual and that means you like the opposite sex. Everyone thinks it's a sin and you'll burn in hell. That's how every kid is raised. Lately my dad has been sending me on dates to get me a girlfriend. The problem is I have my eye on a guy. His name is Finn, Finn Hudson and lately I've been seeing him stare at me. No ones noticed so that's good.

The thing is kids at my school thinks it's disgusting and wrong. My good friend Mercedes got bullied and she had to become home schooled. Lucky for her, her parents are perfectly fine with it they think you can love who you want to as long as your happy. I just wish my parents were like that they treat heterosexual people like a disease and if they get to close they'll die. Most of my friends like Santana and Kurt are definitely normal. They have it all figured out, both if them have people they are In love with. Both of them found someone Santana a girlfriend and Kurt a boyfriend.

Some times I wish I could be normal but I can't be with someone I don't love it wouldn't be right. Throughout this week I was terrified to go to school I was starting to think people were seeing me and Finn staring at each other. I've started to see him outside of school. We go to this abandon building and sing. One time we almost kissed but I pulled away because if someone caught us well you pretty much get it now. Every time I talk to this girl that I'm pretty sure likes me he looks at me as if he's hurt.

As I got up for school and I was feeling extra nervous I don't know why but every time I'm around my dads I get this pit in my stomach like they know and when I finally confess it they'll hate me. I quickly got dressed in some skinny jeans, a blue sleeveless button down, and my black converse. I kept my hair down with some beach waves. I grabbed an apple, kissed my fathers cheeks and headed out the door with my backpack. I'm walking to school because my dad's don't think I'm a good enough driver yet. Next thing I knew Finn pulled up with that lop sided grin that I just adored.

"Need a ride" he asked shyly.

"Finn. I can't you know what people will think" I said walking to his window.

"I know but-

"I know"

"It was worth a try" he said looking down.

"I'll see you at school, Finn" I said backing away.

"Bye Rach- Rachel" he corrected himself.

He always calls me Rach in private cause he doesn't want people to get the wrong idea.

I waved and he was gone. I continued my walk until I saw my best friend Quinn.

"Rachel wait up. You walk too fast" she screamed.

I stopped and waited for her not turning around.

"Thank god" she said hunching over breathing heavily.

"Sorry" I said looking at her.

"So. How's it going with you know who" she said looking around.

"Ok I guess. I mean I just don't want to get in trouble" I said playing with my fingers.

Since Quinn and I are so close I told her about me likening Finn. She was surprised at first but just like Mercedes parents they think love is love. And she was raised to be like that. She supports me and I'm glad I have someone to talk to.

"Hey if you like him go for it. I see all these heterosexual couples. Not everyone is welcoming of them but they're happy" she said putting her hand on my shoulder.

I hugged her. "Thank you. For everything being by my side and being so understanding" I said.

"Your welcome. Anything for you. We are best friends aren't we" she asked laughing.

"Aww the cute couple" Santana said walking up to us with her girlfriend Brittany.

"We're not a couple" I said panicking.

"Oh you will. I see it" she said tapping her temple.

I rolled my eyes and we all walked to school together. I saw Finn staring at me from his locker I slightly smiled and sighed.

"Hey Rachel" Emily said. She was the girl I was talking about that I think likes me. I smiled and waved at her. I shot a quick glance at where Finn was and he was already walking away.

"So um I was wandering if you wanted to go out maybe" she said putting a piece of hair behind her ear. Quinn nudged me with wide eyes.

"Um well. I'm sorry but I just have my eyes on someone else" I said looking down.

"Oh well if you change your mind Im here" she said walking away.

"What was that about she's cute" Santana said.

"I don't know I just don't like her like that" I said walking towards my locker.

She sighed and walked away with Brittany. "Good luck Rachel" Brittany said looking back at me.

"Hey. Maybe you should talk to Finn. He looked pretty bummed" Quinn said leaning against the locker next to me.

"Yah after school I will" I said walking to class.

"Wait Rachel. Lately you've been sad don't let people get in the way" she said grabbing my shoulders and turning me around.

"Ok I get it"

"I just don't want you to be sad all the time. I want to old Rachel back the one who didn't care about this" she sighed.

"Me too" I said and walked away.

All day I couldn't concentrate on class and I honestly didn't care I just needed to talk to Finn.

When the bell ringed I was wandering around trying to find Finn when someone pulled me into a classroom. I looked around and no one was there. Then I realized it was Finn. My heart started beating hard and with just one smile I would blush like crazy.

"Hey" I said.

"Are you dating her" he asked hurt in his eyes.

"What? No I-

He cut me off by kissing me. I was surprised but happy. I kissed back not caring if anyone saw but I was praying to god that no one did. He pulled away and rested his forehead on mine, I could feel his warm breath on my face.

"You have no idea how long I wanted to do that" he said chucking.

I nodded,not sure of what to say. I was too shocked.

"Please say something" he said not letting go of my face in his hands.

"I just- I'm....

"I don't know what to say I mean I like you but how would we make this work" I asked worried.

"Well it's not against the law people just don't approve if it" he said.

"Yah but what would everyone think? My dads? Your mom" I screeched.

I was having an anxiety attack. I got those often. I just don't think I can do it all the stares and all the hate people would give us. I couldn't even handle being the new kid last year.

"Hey, hey breathe. Your ok" Finn said pulling me in for a hug stroking my hair.

I immediately calmed down, for some reason him and only my dad's can clam me down. For once in a while I felt safe in his arms. For once I didn't care who saw us. For once I was happy.