Why Can't I Feel This Way

That Was Close

Chapter 2

-Rachel-

"Did you hear that the towns holding a festival" My dad Leroy jumped with excitement.

"Don't get too excited it's for heterosexuals. Honestly I don't know why they have to do this it's a disgrace" my other dad Hiram scoffed setting the table while I sat at the bar.

"Guys you can't forget that the Mayors sister is heterosexual and he doesn't seem to mind them that much" I said looking up at them.

"Are you defending them" my dad Hiram asked raising is eyebrows.

"Well. As you know me and Quinn are good friends-

"Are you guys dating yet I can feel that happening" My other dad Leroy chimed in.

"Why does everyone keep saying that we're just friends" I snapped.

"Plus I already have a- never mind" I said quickly. I can't believe I almost blurted that out.

"Anyway" I said changing the subject. "As I was saying she's my friend and her parents support it they say love is love no matter who with" I said looking down at my book.

"Yah well If they support that you can't hang out with her anymore" My dad Hiram said. He was always the stricter parent. They're kind I like good cop, bad cop. My dad Hiram being the bad one and my dad Leroy the good.

"Hiram calm down it's not that bad. Sweetheart why don't you go upstairs and we'll call you down for dinner" he said.

I nodded and sped up stairs. I still can't believe I almost said it. But I also can't believe we kissed! Oh it was magical. I need to tell someone. I grabbed my phone and dialed Quinn's number.

"Hello" she picked up.

"Oh my god you'll never guess what happened" I squealed into the phone.

"What! What! Tell me" she screamed.

I had to pull the phone from my ear because how loud she was.

"Ok. Just don't freak out. Me and Finn kissed" I whispered.

"Holy fuuuuudge" she said. I repeatedly told her to not use curse words near me so I gave her some alternatives.

"Thank you for not cursing. But I know" I said happily. Just thinking about the kiss again made me all giddy.

"Oh my gosh does this like make you guys boyfriend and girlfriend" she said dramatizing 'boyfriend' and 'girlfriend'.

"I don't know but you can't tell anyone" I said sternly.

"Ok ok we've already established this. But if you did come out maybe people that haven't come out yet would have the guts to all because of you"

"No. I don't want to be the one who starts that. If someone comes out I'll do it too" I lied. I don't think I'll ever come out. Maybe just change my name and go to a place where people welcome heterosexuals. Like New York.

"Rachel dinners ready" one if my dad's yelled.

"Hey listen I gotta go but I'll call you later"

"Ok but you have to tell me every little detail"

"What. Why"

"Because I haven't even had my first kiss" she said and hung up.

Ok then.

-

Throughout dinner we just talked about our days and I tried to steer clear about the whole dating stuff because I really didn't want to just blurt out something I regretted saying. Even though my dad's love me to death I don't know how they will take it when they find out I'm technically dating a boy? I don't even know if it's classified as dating.

"Well I'm stuffed. I'm just gonna go upstairs" I said slyly walking up the stairs.

"But we haven't even gotten to the subject of your love life" Leroy said.

"I can't hear you" I sang walking towards my room and shutting the door. They know I don't like taking about that. They just think it's embarrassing for me but it's really not. It's just not with who they think it is.

I was about to call Quinn back when I heard tapping on my window. I thought it was just the wind but when I looked over at it I saw Finn sitting in the tree waving.

Oh my god. He can't be here. I'm dead. Even if my dad's don't see him. I'm still dead. Please don't hate me god. I don't see anywhere in the Bible where it says you can't not love who you want.

I quickly walked over to the window and ushered him in. I the walked over to my door and locked it. I'll just say I was taking a bath or shaving?

"What the heck are you doing here" I whisper shouted.

"I just needed to see you" be said holding my hands.

"Yah but you could have called me and we could have met at our place. Not here! Where there witnesses downstairs" I said looking at the door.

"Hey. It's ok I promise" he said sitting on my bed pulling me in between his legs. He was looking Into my eyes but it felt like he was reading all my deepest darkest secrets. As much as I wanted to look away I didn't. His eyes were just such a beautiful shade of brown.

"You know it feels like I should kiss right now. You know to take away all your stress" he said smirking. Oh god that smirk will be the death of me.

"Hmm" I nodded smiling.

"I'm just gonna go for it" he said leaning in.

"Good choice" I said smiling into the kiss. On the outside I might have looked brave but I was panicking on the inside. I know we were both virgins and I'm pretty sure we were each other's first kiss. But if this went farther I wouldn't know the first thing on what to do. Maybe I should sneak my way into that heterosexual festival and ask some people about it. I pulled away from the kiss cause there is no way I'm going alone.

"Hey did you hear about that festival for people like 'us'. I said pointing to him and me.

"Yah, what about it" he asked resting his hands on my waist. Oh bad idea that's gonna distract me.

"I um.." Ok focus. He's not even touching you these jeans are just really hugging you, tightly.

"So. Since we don't really know the first thing about doing any of this. Or how to tell people about it why don't we go" I asked shyly.

"I think that's a great idea but what about you I know you wouldn't like people to know about us" he said. My heart stopped when he said there was an 'us'. There's an us!

"Well maybe we can dress up to not let people see it's us. Like wear big hats and maybe you could wear a fake mustache" I said poking the part above his lips. He blushed.

"I think that's a great idea" he said kissing me again. I was so distracted I totally forgot about my dad's downstairs. I heard my doorknob jiggle and I almost passed out. We quickly pulled away.

"Rachel sweetie are you ok" My dad said knocking lightly.

"Uh...yah I'm just in the bathtub hold on" I said shoving Finn out the window.

"I'll see you at school" he asked smiling.

"Yeah" I said kissing his cheek. "Now go" I said pushing him out the window more.

I then quickly damped my hair, put it in a bun and wrapped my full body robe around me so he won't see my cloths.

I opened the door and hoped for the best.

"Yeah" I said out of breath.

"I was checking on you I mean you did miss our annual 8 o'clock tea" he said worried.

"Oh yah I'm sorry I just had a lot of homework and a really bad headache so I decided to get in the bathtub and relax a little" wow that just came right out. Normally I'm not a good liar but since I've been spending so much time with Finn I'm getting better. Yay me.

"Oh it's ok. Well I'm gonna head to bed love you" he said kissing my forehead.

"Love you too" I sighed closing the door. That was close.