Tell Me Why || Tj + Cyrus (tyrus)

"thank you, tj kippen"

it's been a week since I've been to the park, I just haven't felt like it, I don't feel like doing much anymore. I doodled a cat on my math notebook, pretending to pay attention the the teacher - but I couldn't. Then, the phone rang. I listened as the teacher answered it, and then soon enough she said my name.

"Cyrus, they need you in this counseling office"

"Yes ma'am" I sighed before grabbing my bag and leaving.

—
I take I seat in the counseling room with Mrs. Smith, she was alright I guess.

"So Cyrus, how are you?"

I looked up at her.

"I'm fine." I choked out.

God, did I hate lying. I hated it SO much. But I have to, I don't want her to hate me too.

"Cyrus, I took a look at your grades, they're dropping. Why is that?"

"Dunno." I lied again, I need to stop but I can't.

"Everything fine at home?" She asked.

"Yes." I nodded.

She let out a soft sigh before leaning it a little.

"You can talk to me Cyrus, this is a safe place."

She nodded to the sticker of a pride rainbow with the words "space place" written on it. I didn't care though.

"I told you," I started.

"I'm fine." I lied right through my damn teeth.

"Look, I want to help, and I can't do that if you won't talk to me."

"Can I go now?" My voice was suddenly harsh, I didn't mean to lash out but, I can't help it!

"I- Cyrus I can't let you go."

"What? Why!" My voice got harsher. I hate it, I hate talking to an adult like this, she did nothing wrong.

"Mr. Goodman, I'm going to have to ask you to please calm down." Her voice was soft yet stern, I didn't know that was possible.

"I'm sorry, it's just-"

And that's when I snapped. The uninvited hot tears run down my soft cheeks, I looked down at my shoes, quickly wiping away the traitors.

"I- I don't need anyone's help."

Her face softened.

"If you don't want to talk then I can't make you, but I do have to try and make you feel better, Cyrus."

I nodded, now feeling guilty for my outbursts, also feeling a little better.

"ithinkimgay." I blurt out way to fast, my words combined into one.

"What was that?" She said.

Now's my chance to back down and save myself, but my mouth kept going.

"I don't... feel.. like everyone else." I say, slightly disappointed.

"How so? Everyone's different in their own ways Cyrus, it's okay."

"No- no it's not okay!" I almost shouted, why am I acting like this? I knew exactly why.

"I'm different, in a different way. I feel..." I trailed off.

I can't say it. I just can't, I choke on the word every time I say it in my mind, what makes me think I'd be able to say it out loud?

"Cyrus?"

"I think I should go now."

Without waiting for a reply I grabbed my bag and walked out, I didn't want to do this. I wasn't ready to talk about it, because I wanted to deny it as long as I could. Maybe I'd forget about it if I waited long enough, and then everything would be normal. Everything would be fine.

As I speed walk down the hall I saw the basket ball team walking just a few feet away. Of course they'd be skipping class. I quickly look down, not wanting to come into contact with them. But, I wasn't paying attention and crashed into someone's chest. I fell back on my butt, looking up to meet the eyes of Tj Kippen.

I immediately freaked out, feeling tears form in my eyes. Gosh I'm such a baby! I was overwhelmed now, not only because of the hatred I held for myself, but also because I just bumped into THE TJ KIPPEN, and he was looking down at me in a very intimidating manner. Did I mention my ass hurts? and I was sure I looked pathetic- which made it worse.

"Watch it next time, will ya?" He said rudely before stepping over me.

"I'm s-sorry" I managed to squeak out. He didn't even give me a second thought, all his team mates laughed.

I quickly pick myself up, turning to glance back at them as I gathered myself- but I could've sworn that I saw the Tj Kippen glance back at me. I knew it was only to laugh at me, it is the basketball team after all. Why wouldn't they anyway, I'm different.

I couldn't stop the tears from coming after this, they just poured out and didn't stop. God I wish they'd stop. I cried for many reasons, and now the upper side of my thigh and my bum would be bruised by morning. It was all because of stupid Tj and his stupid friends. I threw the blame on them.

Thank you Tj Kippen. I thought to myself as I began to run, I didn't know where but I kept going. I ran, and then ran some more until I couldn't possibly go any further. I felt myself crash in a corner and hug my knees, hiding my face and just crying. Straight out balling.

sometimes we throw the blame on others, even if it wasn't entirely their fault.

Hey, it's Kat. I'm sorry for the ending being maybe a little bad. I wrote it and then my phone died and wattpad didn't save it. Me having the poor memory I do, I couldn't remember exactly what I wrote, so I just rewrote the ending, hah. *fake laughter.* this chapter is still a little short, isn't it? I can assure you this won't be a short story, I've got a lot of things to cover and a ton of character development to go through. I'm sorry, I'm still trying to get used to writing on wattpad, it's very new and different. Thank you to the people would see actually reading this! I actually didn't think it would get past 3 reads!