~The Têachers Pēt~bõyxbõy

The Têachers Pēt~I'm here~12

Alexander's POV

Mr Saunders -Jay- and I were sitting at the kitchen counter eating the lovely breakfast he  prepared a few minutes ago. Well, more like trying to eat.
It was devastatingly silent and I was anxious beyond recognition. After my little slip up —well more like second little slip up— Jay has refused to look or even talk to me. I really don't understand why I keep doing these stupid things to make Jay hate me. It seems like since the moment we met, I've been doing nothing other than saying things to make Jay upset.
Although I don't really know why he should be upset.
I'm nothing to him. To anyone. After this little infatuation he has with me is over, I'll go back to my life of being tortured, alone and utterly miserable for the rest of my life; and Jay will go on with his by meeting a girl, falling in love, getting married and having perfect kids in a perfect family; living the American dream.

Sting!

Huh. That hurt more than I thought it would.
But its true. This kindness he has with me. The temporary need to be nice...its nothing more than a faze. It'll pass. It always does. I've been there before.
They just want to discover the little weirdo kids secrets. Find out what makes him tick. What he's hiding.
Its always the same.
Befriend the akward loner kid. Get  him to trust you. And then get him high on drugs, strip him naked, beat the living shit out of him and then leave him alone, battered and bruised in the boys locker room without any clothes.
I fell for it three times. Not exactly all the same scenario, but same outcome. All because I was naïve and willing to try.

Learn from past mistakes.

Never trust anyone.

That's what I've learned throughout my short lifetime and I'm willing to stick by it.
Then why does the thought of Jay not being my friend, using me like all the others, then leaving me for some girl to live the perfect life hurts so much?
I'll tell you why. No! Not you again. Get out of my head!

Because you know you aren't worth it. Be quiet!
You know you can never give him the perfect life. Your a messed up, useless, disgusting freak. Stop, be quiet. Please.
I mean look at you? What do you have to offer him except pain and misery? Remember what that man said? George? Hmm? Please
Think back Alli-poo. Think long and hard.

*flashback*

"Where are you you disgusting maggot! Get your lazy ass out here and clean up this mess!"
I was hiding in the cupboard upstairs in the attic at one of our past houses in California. It was actually big enough for my 10 year old body to fit and lay in a comfortable position. I've just been beaten to near an inch of my life and I was thoroughly sore and my body ached all over. I was sure bones were fractured if not broken, and all I did to receive this sort of treatment was to ask the man that was supposedly my father if we could go to the park and get ice-cream.
All my friends at school bragged about all the time they spent with their dads, getting hugs and kisses, receiving presents even when its not their birthday or Christmas, and spending lots of time playing and having sleepovers at other friends houses with their dads as well.
I wanted that.
I wanted my family to be a normal family.
Not shattered and broken beyond repair.
Not getting kicks instead of hugs. Slaps instead of kisses. Being forced to clean and prepare meals instead of playing. Being beaten until I bleed instead of playing with my dad. And locked away in the attic instead of getting presents, celebrating birthdays or Christmases.
I crawled out of the attic and limped my way downstairs just to find the man sprawled off  on the couch, beer bottles scattered all over, and dirty dishes stocked up high on the coffee table in front of him.
I limped my way over.
"Ye-yes f-father?" Slap! Before I knew it, I was backhanded across the face by him. "Don't you ever call me that again you filth" he spat. "Yes fa-ssir", I whimpered.
"Now get your lazy ass to cleaning. I want those plates spotless. You got it!", he ordered. "Yes sir"
I started to pick up the plates but my body ached and I was in so much pain that the plates slipped and shattered on the ground.
"I-i'm ss-sorry I didn't m-mean to", I went to pick them up but didn't get the chance to. I was grabbed roughly and thrown across the room. Then he stomped over and began kicking me with his boot while I curled up into a ball and brought my hands protectively over my head.
"YOU INGRATE! YOU INSUFFERABLE LITTLE SHIT! YOU DESTROY MY DISHES AND DARE TO OPEN YOUR DISGUSTING MOUTH TO APOLOGISE!!" *whack whack whack* YOU PIECE OF TRASH. YOUR WORSE THAN GARBAGE. IT'LL BE A DAMN MIRACLE IF ANY SANE PERSON IN THIS WORLD COULD LOVE SOMETHING AS FILTHY AS YOU. YOUR NOTHING! Just a useless waste of time from a whore of a mother. Nobody would want or need something like you!"
He spat on me and then continued to kick me until I passed out.