"I like you, Sean. For the longest time." She was proud as she said those words complete and straight. Yet her hands were cold, body shuddering, knees shaking. She was never this nervous in front of him.
"Sorry, Kaycee." Then everything seemed to slowly fall apart. "I never liked you nor saw you as that. For me, you're a little sister. It will never change." Did someone just stopped her heart from pumping?
She gave him a smile that reaches her ears, almost convincing that it's real. "Look at you! I'm just kidding!" You dreamt to be an actress, Kaycee. You have to try to be one in this situation and show your acting skills. "Sorry, I had to do that. Someone just dared." She whispered, smirking. She could still see the guiltness on his face but then it faded when she spoke again. "Hey, don't you ever think that it would happen! I would never look at you like that even if you're the last person on earth!" She chuckled, hoping it's effective then she sighed as he looked somehow, convinced.
"You better don't ricebowl, or you'll get heartbroken." She knows that he meant it to be a joke but as he said those words, she felt being suffocated. I've fallen for you, Sean. And now my heart is shattered.
She woke up, feeling that agony in her heart again that has been haunting her everyday. When will this nightmare end?
It has been a year since she told him her feelings yet he rejected it. She tried to save herself from the situation. Luckily, she did. She appeared okay from the outside when she was slowly getting destroyed inside. Sean thought she was telling the truth when she told him that it was just a challenge for her to say that. Little did he know, that confession was pure and real and now, he has no idea that he's killing her everyday.
She took a deep breath before checking the time. She rushed out of bed and prepared everything for another day, another dance, another pain. This is her daily basis. Waking up, seeing him, pretending to be okay, watching him with someone else, slowly dies inside and endures everything. It's been a year and I still couldn't move on. How would she? Everyday, she could see him and his smile. She wanted to hate him so much but everything he's doing is holding her back.
"Ricebowl!" He ran up and enclosed her in a hug. She crossed her arms on her chest, hoping he wouldn't hear the loud beating of her heart, caused by both joy and despair.
"Shamu." Kaycee weakly smiled at him. As they waited for Tricia, he told her about what happened yesterday. About his date yesterday.
"I was thinking, maybe it's okay to finally introduce her to the family. You know... you met Ashley anyways and you told me that she's cool."
Tears were trying to escape her eyes. Thank goodness, it didn't show.
Enough, Kaycee. Stop chasing.
"That's cool. I'm happy that you're happy, Shamu."
"Thank you, Ricebowl."
*****
Another day came and the nightmare woke her up as usually. But this day would be different. She told herself that she'd stop. I will try to move on even if it's the hardest thing to do.
Kaycee entered the studio and saw Sean's eyes lit up upon seeing her. He came running towards her direction but she chose to move away quickly, ignoring him. Her eyes quickly diverted into group of boys, chatting. She couldn't think of anything more to do so she just ran up to them.
"Heyyy... everyone!" She awkwardly greeted. Oh shoot. How awkward could this be? They all looked at her with the flushed look on their faces.
