Chapter 16:
"His Love"
(Genesis Narrating)
I never thought I would love again like how I love him. Forever he and I will always be together. I want him to father my children and I want him to be the man I grow old with. It was such a weird journey, so many things have happened. Some of it was my fault and some of it was his. I knew he wasn't perfect and I knew that there was going to be a lot mo
re challenges in the future. Our relationship was just beginning and there was going to be a lot of people who will try everything to break us apart but I know now that I have to put my trust in him and in everything he does, support him. I had to show him that I was always going to be here for him and that I was devoted. I refuse to lose him again and I refuse to give up on our love. When we were apart I dreamt of him and it hurrt so bad to know I couldn't have him, I really wanted to feel his touch but I knew he wasn't here. Last night was the most incredible thing I've ever experienced, just knowing he was the one doing those things made it feel even more sensational. I remembered every single stroke and kiss. I felt goosbumps, It was magical and so beautiful. He made me say what he promised he'd make me say but the truth was that I've always been his ever since we met. From when I first laid eyes on him my heart sensed it and even though in my mind I had convinced myself he was a self-centered conceited jerk my heart thought the opposite, He's made me realize so many things about love and how to love, how to react and how to have control. He knows what I feel even when I try to hide it. He knows when I want to cry even if I don't show it. He just knew, it was like he had a peep hole to my soul. The Tom Kaulitz everyone knew on the outside was nothing compared to the Tom Kaulitz I knew when we were alone. He was so kind and sweet also very childish and playful. He was more open with me than before. After we made love we just talked, he kissed me and was so amorous. We talked about many many things, he even talked about his childhood with me and the many adventures he and Bill had. He asked me if I ever visited my mother's grave and I said, no because she didn't have one. I told him that the reason she didn't have a grave was because my father had killed her and after he killed her he chopped her up and feed her to the sharks in the ocean, I told him that my sister and I ran as he was killing her and how we heard my mother's screams of pain and agony as he did that. We were sent to Spain where my mother's relatives were and my father was placed in prison, he was still alive but My sister nor I cared. He felt for me and held me in his arms, he kissed my head. I've never cried in front of anyone ever, He was the first man who held me that felt my tears on his chest, he was the first to hear my cry for my mother and he was the first to see the pain I felt.
I opened my eyes and it was already morning. I looked at him and he was still sound asleep, He looked so tired and yet so relaxed, almost happy. He was smiling in his sleep but then he grabbed a pillow and looked like he was in a deep sleep. I smiled. I looked around the room and it was a complete mess, we were everywhere last night. In the end it was both soothing for our heart and soul as well as pleasurable for our bodies. I thought about what it'd be like to wake up to him every morning for the rest of my life and it was a good way to go. That's what I wanted. I wondered how our kids would look but yet again maybe I was getting a bit ahead of myself. I giggled softly and smiled. I felt so happy and so in love. Oh to feel stupidly insanely and crazy in love....It was beyond compare. I wouldn't trade it for the world. His love was better than the air I breathed, it was better than any sweet thing, it was better than life. There are a million things I could say but it wouldn't be enough. This life was way too short, but if you live it right then everything you did would be worth it. Use this life wisely and live it to the fullest. Love like you can never ever give enough.
He was all I needed now. His love meant everything to me and so did he. If I knew what love was now, it's because of him.
I felt his lips on my shoulder.
"Good Morning Beautiful" he said with a smile.
To be continued......
