My Writing

Oh God.

I just realized this is the last time I'm going to see you until Christmas.

and I'm wondering if it's hurting you like its hurting me.

at least you have a chance to move on.

but I'm still stuck with the same old people,

the same old town,

the same old life for the next year.

and oh god the pain in my heart increases with every beat.

my eyes are constantly burning with the threat of tears that I won't let burst forward.

I don't want people to ask me what's wrong.

because they won't understand.

they'll pat me on the back and tell me "it's okay." or

"you'll move on" or

"he'll be back soon"

but their words won't be able to heal me like seeing you would.

and oh god what if you were to come back loving someone else.

you told me you wouldn't ever dream of it,

but my brain is thinking of every little thing that could possibly go wrong.

and if by some far off chance you lied,

I know I won't be able to hold my tears in anymore.

the burning in my eyes and the pain in my heart will get worse and worse.

until the dam breaks and the glass shatters

and I'm left with a broken heart and a tear-stained face.

so please keep that statement true.

and oh god I just realized that I am going to miss you.

I am going to miss you SO much.