Leave A Scar (Fullmetal Alchemist)

Down This Same Road Again

A/N: I completely forgot to mention a few really vital things about this story, and I figure now is better than later!

1) The writing of this fic is very psychological. I've created a lot of characters (most have been developing for around 15 years (I'm 20, so they've been around for a while!)), and the MC of this story is by far the most complex character I've ever made--and she's only been developing for less than five months! From this point on, her mood/self-esteem effects the writing style, so when she's "down", the writing will become more plain. I can talk about this character all day, especially the further we get into the fic, but my main point in this little note is that any and all grammatical description errors, awkward word choices, and generally funky descriptions are all the result of the main character's ability to "write". Not mine ;)

2) Similar thing to note #1, but a little more detailed (and also an example). This ties back into chapter 9 with the homunculi--which, grammatically speaking, would technically be lowercased. However, our main character likes to see certain things as "bigger" than she is; more powerful, in a way. I've done something similar to this with the word "alchemist" throughout the story (either reference to Ed as someone with more "status" than her (Alchemist) or as her equal (alchemist)).

If any of that's confusing, just let me know and I'll try to re-explain!

In terms of this chapter: you guys know this story is a pretty big AU, right? Okay; just makin' sure.

Enjoy!!

We had gravitated towards the middle of the rooftop, where there was a bit more light from the surrounding buildings. Maybe they thought I'd jump off the roof, if I was too close to the railing. I wouldn't, of course. I was much too weak to do something so strong.

My legs were shaking, but the more I walked the more my mind came back to me. Enough to realize why we were walking in the first place.

Al still held my right hand, guiding me as he took his gentle, giant steps backwards. Ed had both hands on me; one still clasping my hand, the other supporting the middle of my back. The thoughts that came to me were ones that rang out in their voice, some collective mixture of both.

"Keep moving forward. You're never alone."

I nearly crumbled all over again. I stopped when their steps slowed, allowing Al to gradually sit down and move me with him. After a small, tiny squeeze, Al's hand found his lap again. Halfway down to a sitting position, Ed's hands left me too, but almost immediately, a coat was draped over my shoulders.

Warm. I felt the fabric curl against my arms as my knees came to the ground again, much gentler than before. But the joints and the muscles hurt, returning to the same position they'd been in for so long. So I shifted, folding my legs and crossing my shins and feet underneath each other. More relaxed. I felt Ed's coat respond, shaping to the form of my legs and knees. I didn't even realize his hands were still pinching the fabric by my shoulders, still trying to make sure it was on me as much as possible.

I knew I'd never be able to repay this kindness. Nothing could compare to that... Incredible sense of loyalty. I was a horrible friend; I didn't deserve anything they were giving me.

Ed was sitting in front of me again, fixing up the front of the coat and making sure it was completely covering me. His eyes didn't meet mine, and when I looked to them, his stare just moved further away, hands continuing to adjust, slipping down and making sure my ankles and feet were covered as much as they could be.

There was... Something different about the way he was acting. Something about his stare; there was a distance in those eyes, maybe a memory in his brain taking his focus. I wasn't sure how I could decipher that much. Maybe I knew from experience; the hollow feeling that came with thinking about something you didn't want to think of in the first place.