Depths of a River

Chapter 37- Dear Diary

Dear Diary 2009.
It's almost the end of the year which means the start of high school. We had our last dance of the year tonight. I wore the white dress that Grandma gave me. Addie dropped me off. I went alone because Maisie couldn't go. I danced alone and drank the juice they gave us. Mr. Stone came to me while I was standing outside to catch some air after dancing. He told me to follow him to the classes down the corridors.. The grade one classes wasn't locked so we went inside the one. It was really dark inside and it felt weird to be inside a classroom at night. It was really quiet, and I heard the music from a distance. Mr. Stone opened the freezer in the back of the class and took out two ice-creams. I sat on the teacher's table. It was Miss Applebottom's classroom. I felt so naughty, sitting there without her knowing but Mr. Stone said that he will keep a secret if I do. I ate the ice-cream that he gave me and finished it a while after Mr. Stone finished his. He walked up to me and took the empty wrapper from my hand. He grabbed my hand together with the wrapper and held it for a while. He slowly let go of my hand and walked to the bin to throw it away. I laughed at him for being funny. He walked back to me and stood in front of me. He took a strand of hair from my face and tugged it behind my ear. He moved my legs with his hips, so he could stand between my legs that were hanging off the table. My heart raced, and I didn't know what he was doing. He moved closer to my face and I smelled a strong smell of whiskey that my uncle drinks on the weekend. He smelled the same. He kissed me. I couldn't move. I just let it happen. He pulled my one leg up, so my foot was on the table. He slowly moved his hand up my leg until he was under my dress and slipped his hand inside my underwear. It tickled a lot at first until he became rough. It hurt a lot and I told him that but he just carried on and said it will hurt only for the first few minutes then I won't hurt ever again. He lied. It still hurt the night when I went to bed and the day after. I thought Mr. Stone was my friend but friends don't hurt each other. I will burn this book together with my dress when

The sentence didn't finish. The book fell on my lap. It was dark already, and Rodrique was sleeping on the other couch. The television was on.

I realized why she became the way she was. She was thirteen years old and an adult man did things like that to her. I felt my heart break inside my chest. I wished with everything inside me that I could hug her and tell her that everything will be okay, but I couldn't. It was too late; the secrets came out too late. There was nothing else written after that. Why didn't she burn the book like she said she would? I had to search for the rest of the answers somewhere else. I still didn't know who the father of the baby was.

I packed the diaries back in the box and set it neatly on the television stand where it was before. I woke up Rodrique to go to his bed. He woke up and walked with me to his bedroom. He held me tight before I fell asleep.

I woke up and made us breakfast. He observed the whole time while I was busy in the kitchen. I called my boss after we had eaten. I told him about Cleone, and he said that I should take all the time I need. I called the funeral house after to book her memorial. I booked it for upcoming Tuesday. I didn't have much family to tell but, I called everyone that I knew. I sat with Rodrique after calling everybody.

"Can we relax for a bit?" He asked while staring into my eyes.

I nodded and smiled before I lied down next to him. We watched a television show but I couldn't pay attention to it because I couldn't stop thinking about Cleone. I sat upright after a while.

"May I go to Galilani's for a while? I promise I will be safe." I asked him.

"You don't have to ask permission." He said and kissed my hand.

I took his car keys from the table and head out. I drove over to Galilani's apartment. I didn't tell her that I was coming; I hoped that she was at home.

I parked in front of her house and walked to her front door. I had knocked a few times before the door swung open.

"What?!" She yelled at me.

Her eyes were smeared black from her makeup and I could see she has been crying.

"Galilani?" I asked softly.

She burst out in tears.

"I'm sorry, I thought you were Clay." She said through the tears.

She had on her satin robe and sleepwear underneath. She invited me inside and I followed her into the living room. We sat down on the couch. I kept quiet and waited for her to talk.

"We had a fight, and he left just before you knocked, that's why I thought it was him at the door. I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm upset about Cleone as well." She said and cried harder.

"What did you and Clayton fight about?" I asked her.

He left me; he said that he couldn't be with me anymore. I am too much for him." She said while covering her face with both her hands.

I moved closer to her and hugged her.

"I think he has somebody else." She said while still crying.

"If he does, he will regret it, and we don't know that there is somebody else for sure. I'll make us hot chocolate." I said while rubbing my hand up and down her arm.

I got up and walked to her kitchen. I knew the place like it was my own.

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