Bam! It's Margera!

Chapter 13 - I'm coming home.

Since the death of my parents, we were informed of when the funeral were to take place. My mum told me when I was younger that she'd always wanted her ashes to be thrown in the sea. So, for her and my step dad, Id return home to attend the funeral and to scatter the ashes with my brother. When I told Bam all of this, I broke down once again. He always made me feel better about it. He'd cradle me and stroke my hair until I regained strength. He then insisted that he went with me to the funeral. I told him that he doesn't have to do it, but, like I said, he insisted. He told me that I can keep my stuff at his so I only pack the stuff I'll need. Once done, We make our way to the aiport. 

"You alright, babe?" He says to me as I look our of the window of the car. 

"Yeah. Just thinking." I reply. The car journey is pretty quiet. We don't talk much unless Bam crops up a conversation which usually simmers down after a few minutes. When we arrive at the airport, we carry our luggage toward the giant belt that takes our stuff away and wait for the plane to be announced.

"The plane leaving for Exeter Airport will be departing in 30 minutes. Please make your way to the gate." We hear the announcement and head for the gate. 

While on the plane with Bam and my brother who met us by the gate, I take start to talk to Bam.

"Thank you. For, you know, being there for me when I needed you." He looks at me and smiles. 

"No problem, babe." I hold his hand. 

"Because I really appreciate it. Everytime you were with me when I cried, I felt safe. Like you were my bubble. And I just.. God. Im so glad I had you there." He puts his arm around my shoulder so I snuggle into him, holding his hand. I decide to catch some sleep before we arrive so I close my eyes and let my head wonder.

I'm woken by Bam stroking my face, telling me that we've arrived. I gather my stuff and Bam, my Brother and I all exit the plane. We grab our belonging's from the belt and wait for the taxi outside.

"I can already feel the difference." I say to Bam, holding his hand. A taxi then pulls up so we all throw our stuff in the back and crawl inside. I tell him the address of my brother's house first so he can go home. When we arrive, I hug him and thank him for coming up to see me. Once he's gone, I give the address of my house and wait for us both to arrive.

"It's not an impressive house, and it's probably messy so I'm sorry about that." I say to Bam, starting to feel a little nervous about him seeing my natural environment. After a while, we finally turn up. I pay the driver and he helps us carry our stuff out from the boot. It's pretty late so the streets are empty, making it easier for us to get inside. Once inside, I can't help but feel a sense of melancholy. I miss home and now that my parents are gone, I feel like I don't have a home. It's a feeling I suppose Ill have to live with and I know It'll be hard. I show Bam around the house, the rooms and such, then we head to bed. I throw off my clothes and slide under the covers. He joins me within seconds, wrapping his arms around my belly. I stare at the clock for what seems like hours until I finally fall asleep. One second, It's 1:28am, the next, it's 6:57am. Its like I fell asleep with my eyes open. I sit up and rub my eyes, not sure whether to get up or go back to sleep. I look over at the window. I could watch the sunrise.. I pull my legs out of bed and tip toe over to the window, whiping the dusk off the ledge. I climb up, being careful to not make a lot of noise and wait for dawn. Some time passes, and Bam turns over.

"What are you doing up this early?" He says, groaning as he pulls off the covers.

"You dont have to get up, babe. I just wanted to see the sunrise. A tear falls down the side of my cheek, so I quickly whipe it away, not wanting to cause attention.

"You alright?" He stands slowly and walks over to me. I look up at him, his eyes are warm and deep. He comes closer so i lean my head on his chest. Putting his arm under my legs, he picks me up and carries me to the bed, laying me down gently.

"You can cry if you want to." He tells me, whiping another fallen tear.

"I dont think I have a choice. They're just falling. It's like my body is supposed to be crying but my heart is so numb that Im not feeling the pain that I should." I sit up and put my head in my hands, confused of what Im feeling.

"Shh. It's alright. It'll get better."

The time has come for my parent's funeral. My heart has been aching all morning. When I woke, It was early. Bam stayed asleep so I figured Id just get ready. My mum never agreed to having black at funerals so there will only be colour to represent her personality. The morning passes, and we arrive at the church, Bam's hand in mine. I see my dad and sister so I walk over to greet them after all these years.

"Hi papa." He turns, his eyes red, looking exhausted. He manages a smile so I hug him tightly. I look up at Cari, my sister, and hug her next. It's a very tender and emotional time for everyone, even Bam. Every now again, I look over at him and see that he also looks sad. After what seemed like ages, Everyone is in the church. And let me tell you, the crowd is astonishing. People from all religions, genders and families have turned up to say goodbye to my mum and step dad. When the time comes, the curtains are drawn on the two coffins that hold what used to be my parents. At this point, I start to cry hysterically. Tom puts his hand on my shoulder, Bam holds my hand, and my father holds my knee. Ive never known pain like this. When the funeral finishes, I exit the church and decide to go for a walk. Bam tries to follow but Tom holds him back.

"Give her time."