Merry Christmas Mr. Malfoy (Book 1)

Chapter 10 : Carrots, Sensuality, and Perplexity

Carrots, Sensuality, and Perplexity

"I think we need to set a few things straight."

"Yeah...I don't think this tree is straight, either."

Hermione glared furiously at the blond, who was staring at the Christmas tree slowly opening in the stand to the left of the fireplace. It was small corner, a home of a desk that had been transfigured into the tree stand – the chair was now a small rug – and just out of the way so that the tree wouldn't catch fire.

The blond cupped his chin with his forefinger and thumb, staring curiously at the fir as he waved his wand idly, trying to straighten the vegetation.

"You're not even listening to me," Hermione snapped, wanting to get this discussion done and over with.

While there had been no tension during the walk back, the second they had been confined to the Tower, the air had thickened and the level of anxiety rose to impossible levels. She was uncomfortable with this, unsure of what to do or say now that they were alone.

It was so...odd. One minute they were kissing and the next they were setting up a tree and trying to act as normal as possible. Actions, she quickly noticed, did not always do the job. There were things that a simple action could not mask; the way her heart sped up, the way it became harder to breathe, and how she could barely stare at him for more than two seconds without blushing.

She hated to admit it, abhorred admitting it, but, it had to be said – mentally, of course; she would never dare say it aloud. The kiss had been mediocre.

'Hermione Granger, you are a bad liar.'

All right...the kiss had been more than mediocre.

'Getting closer to the truth...'

Okay, okay, the kiss had been mind blowing.

'All right! Now you get a cookie for being honest.'

Shut the fuck up.

Now that her schizophrenic moment was over, she focused back to the fact that the kiss had created fireworks and nearly swept her off of her feet.

His lips had felt so...nice against hers. The way he had managed to gently bring her into the kiss, how just touching her face had created such intimacy, it made it hard to forget the embrace. Her body had lit like gasoline to a flame, burning with a feverish desire she had never experienced before in her life.

It was...excuse the lack of a better description...insanely mind-blowing.

But, once they had separated, once she was forced to recognize whose lips had been on hers, the pitter-patter of desire immediately transformed into a thundering of terror and anxiety. The level of comfort had been decreased exponentially; a barrier had been breached, increasing the intimacy between the two of them. With this new intimacy, these new feelings swamping her body, it became difficult to look at him, to be in the same room with him, without feeling nervous and worried.

She was terrified that he would discover her secret, horrified at the idea that he had found the kiss sub-par while it had excited every nerve ending in her body, and unbelievably uncomfortable with him.

It couldn't be helped; the increase of intimacy came with a cost.

'Fuck you, Peeves, fuck you!'

She mentally swore over and over again, wanting to break down and cry and jump for joy all at the same time.

Her plans were now ruined; she and Draco would not be able to spend more than five minutes with each other without feeling tense. Their budding relationship had developed a new awkwardness that she feared may never go away.