The Last Kiss

Chapter 1

 

 HALF OF THE HEART

“I love you, too.”

Kirsten giggled. She’s talking to her boyfriend over the phone. She always talked with him; always whispering sweet little nothings and making wet kissing sound through the phone. I was hoping she would get over it by now. I mean, I am happy that she has found the love of her life. It’s just that, I’m feeling love deprived.

“Okay, seriously. How much longer can this possibly last?” I said, drumming my fingers on the yellow fiberglass table of the cafeteria. She said goodbye to her boyfriend on the phone.

“You talkin’ to me?” she asked, her blue eyes were really in love as she opened it widely. She tossed her wavy chocolate-brown hair behind her shoulder.

“Oh, yes! I’m talking to you”, I wagged my finger to her. “Don’t you think it’s time to tone it down a little? Because some of us aren’t quite happy as you. Some of us are a little bit love deprived.”

She turned to Arielle whose mind was focused on the food she’s eating. Her long blond hair was tied into a ponytail. “Are you love deprived, Arielle?”

She looked to us. Finally, her eyes went away from her plate. “I’m happy.” She grinned and resumed herself in eating. Foods could already make her happy.

“You’re love deprived?” She laughed at me. “What happened to Lance?”

“Lance?” I balked. “Don’t you ever talk about Lance. Don’t you ever mention his name!” Because hearing his name makes me feel the pain I’m trying to bear inside me. Hearing his name would make me remember the time when we were happy together, and misses it. Hearing his name makes me realize how much I miss him. Hearing his name would make me feel foolish, because despite of all the pain he’d caused me, I was still irrevocably in love with him.

“Uh oh! You broke up?” Kirsten eyed me carefully.

I nodded. I looked down into my half-eaten burger, remembering Lance’s voice as  he delivered the words that shattered my heart. “He told me he isn’t happy with me anymore. He told me that even if we turned the world upside down, we can never be happy together. He told me that he love somebody else.”

“Oh Riley, I’m so sorry to hear that”, she said gently, and squeezed my hand that was rested on the table. I felt my eyes were stinging.

“Don’t be hurt, Riley, but I just wanted to break this to you.” Arielle spoke again. “Don’t you think it’s the time that you have to stop having a boyfriend? They’ll just hurt you. Because….” There was a pause, then she continued. “… because they really don’t love you. They’re just playing you.”

“I just tried. Hoping that it’ll work out.”

“Of course it’ll not work out.” Her eyebrows merged together. “Guys would always want a girl, Riley. Can’t you get it? Love isn’t fair for gays like you, and never will it be. So…” she popped open the can of her soda. “…please stop. Because it’s kinda irritating every time you’re crying when you’re hurt.”

“As if I could stop my heart and forbid it not to love”, I swallowed hard. “If only it’s possible to live without loving at all, I’d be grateful for that. Because I so know how it hurts when the one you love fall out of love.” I sighed and pressed my lips together. “It’s just that, I’m also a human. I do love. So, don’t you ever talk to me as if it’s my fault.”

“Whatever. If you’ll just set your mind not to, you can do it”, she rolled her eyes and shook her head. “Why not be happy and be contented with the things you have?”