Why can't life go back to the way it was? Why can't I wear a smile like I used to? I can't even bare to stand in the mirror and see 'The Life Changing Mbali' I used to see. I hate men. But why me, why should that even be done to anyone?
I've always, I mean always ignored my mother when she told me that life is not as easy as it seems, but why did I have to experience the bitter side of the world in this manner and at this time?
As I was still thinking my mother walked in on me, "Mbali my child this can't go on, you have to go out. Mbali the world is such a great place"
Great you say haha, weren't you the one that told me that "the world is a very ugly and dirty place BITTER AND CRUEL!" remember those words ma?
"Yes Mbali I remember telling you those words. I remember watching out for my daughter. I remember telling you those specific words the day you had your first period and I tell you Mbali once again that this world is a very cruel place but my child it's up to you to make the best of every moment, to cry the tears that come unto your eyes and to mostly tackle challenges life gives you."
Great oh so lovely, the best words at such a wrong time! Either way what do you know about pain ma? Don't tell me working as a domestic worker is pain because I am pretty sure leaving your child for another family, for a bigger house is no pain at all! Just admit that you left me so you could get a taste of what how it feels to live in a big house with food day in day out and no problem at all.
"Mbali *sighs* you have no right to tell me about pain, you know what ..."
Walk away like you do every time your child needs your help go ahead and don't look back like you didn't when you walked out of the house to work for the Wilson's.
Yes she walked out on me when I am in time of need. While I was still trying too cool down from the talk ma and I had a person I did not expect nor want to see at this moment walked in, Baba khumalo. Yes he's the one that found me, taken care of me when ma was away and welcomed me in his loving home but I've lost respect for him, the day after I was raped he had a light reaction towards the whole situation. "My child" he said and continued "uMama says you haven't been out of your room since the day I found you, why don't you go out, get some air you know."
I blankly stared at his face. Go away other wise I will scream, atleast this time I'll have my voice. He sadly walked out and I let out a sigh of relief.
*
I can't go and face the world, I feel dirty, I feel opened up, I feel like each and every man that I will surely come across in the outside world would see me as a snack, someone to take out their stress on, someone who will be their sexual healing.
*
10pm
I can't sleep, I feel like this demon that's been inserted in me is here to stay, I can't do this and I won't do this.
After another day of over thinking it finally came to an end, I was sure the next day will be the same and the next and so on. I took my phone and switched it on, when it was on I was aroused by the notifications I got; 30 Messages from my best friend Lesego, 45 missed calls from Kabelo woah Kabelo flip I have to call back, but what will I say ?
Oh my no! I can't. I tip toed to the kitchen and when I got there I thought I was dreaming.
YOU ARE READING
Her Story:The Bush
General FictionAfter what happened in the thorn bush, everything changed. As a female her rights were violated but that did not stop her from fighting. Besides the life changing event she encountered more life threatening challenges, she nearly lost her life in t...
