Blood & Water Flashback One Shots

4 - The Sensible Choice

Carrie swore she could feel the germs crawling on her from the visitation table at the Imperial County jailhouse while she waited for Angel. He was only in for thirty days but was still allowed visitation and even though she was sure she was going to end things, Carrie dutifully went to see him.

"Hey," Angel beamed when they finally brought him in. They hugged briefly, all that was allowed, and sat across from one another. "Thanks for coming."

"Of course," she smiled.

"You look good," he winked at her.

Carrie laughed a little then frowned. "You look pale."

"Don't get a lotta sun," he shrugged.

"Yeah," her lips didn't turn up again, she was still frowning at him. "You okay though?"

"I'll live," he said lightheartedly.

Her body language changed. "Speaking of, uuhh, my dad died."

"Shit," he hissed, hanging his head. "I'm sorry, mi dulce."

Nodding, Carrie could feel the tension between them rising. "He was killed, in prison," she said.

"I kind of figured," he said awkwardly. "I'm sorry I couldn't be there and I know you got issues with your old man, Car, and this shit," he gestured to the guards, "Ain't helping, but I'm gonna be out soon. Stupid bullshit 30 day, you know?"

"Angel," she shook her head. "I can't do this. I can't live this life. I was forced into it with my dad but I don't want to keep living it."

Closing his eyes he sighed, "It was a fight, Car, it's not a ten year stint."

"I know," she assured him. "My dad's first time was for a DUI, so, it tends to start small."

The disappointment his mother and father felt was crushing to Angel, especially in the shadow of his brother's Ivy League free ride but to have Carrie washing her hands of him was something else. Angel expected it from his family but he truly didn't think she would turn her back on him so quickly, that's not to say he didn't understand it in the wake of her father's death.

"I'm sorry I fucked up."

"I love you," she said reaching over to take his hands despite that being against visitation rules. "I love you fucking much and it's been a few months, it's insane, but I can't do this to myself. I love you too much to watch this shit. It's fucking selfish and I'm sorry."

"Carrie," he whimpered as she stood up. "Please." When she refused to look at him he grabbed her hand. "I need you." He admitted shamefully. "You're the only good thing I have right now."

"I'm sorry," she whispered, scurrying out once the guard opened the door for her.

--

Carrie didn't see Angel for six months after she heartlessly broke up with him during visitation. They ran into each other at the DMV, of all miserable places, Carrie to update her ID and Angel to get his motorcycle license. They made eye contact multiple times before she finally broke and waved at him. Angel looked at the empty seat beside him and Carrie nodded before moving over to sit beside him.

"Hey," she smiled.

"What's up?" They played casual but their eyes betrayed both of them.

"Nothing," she shrugged. "You?"

"Nothing," he said. "I heard the good news," he said, grabbing her left hand. "Congratulations."

"Yeah," she was less than thrilled. "Thanks."

"KInda quick," he remarked

Carried nodded. "Extenuating circumstances."

"Pregnant?"

She drew her head back. "Not anymore."

"Shit," he huffed, angry at himself. "Sorry."

"You're the king of putting your foot in your mouth, Angel."

"I fuckin' know," he rolled his eyes.

"You want to know, don't you?"

"I'm nosy as fuck," he admitted.

"Miscarriage," she said bluntly. "Don't apologize, I was kind of relieved, to be honest. I was upset," she added quickly, "Don't get me wrong, but I don't want a baby yet and I don't want one wi," she didn't finish that thought out loud.

"Why don't you just back out then?"

"I love him," she scoffed. "I do," she said again.

"Don't have to convince me," he said coolly.

"I should go," she stood up quickly. "It's good to see you, Angel."

Chewing on his bottom lip he nodded and winked at her, his little way of acknowledging everything they didn't say, everything they knew.

"Oh Car," he said when she was a few feet away. "You don't have to invite me to the wedding, I don't have a suit."

There was no question as to what he truly meant by that. Carrie walked back to him and kissed him, open mouth and full of passion, before heading out without finishing her business.