Dear Emmett

Chapter | Thirteen

I sunk further into the congenial couch, my shoulders hunching protectively. Ivy sat virtually on top of me – having three people on a two-seater couch warranted that – with Maya on her other side, rhythmically stroking Ivy's hair absently as the little girl played on my phone. Rhys sat adjacent on his own armchair which was bursting at the seams from where Ivy had used to haul the stuffing out of it as a baby.

Maya, having just picked us up from school, had the afternoon off, and just as well. The car ride home had been uncannily silent, just as the room remained now. Ivy and I got stuck in the backseat, with Rhys and Maya in the front. With my headphones in and my eyes closed in an attempt to find bliss, I blocked out the world. Blocked out the deep ache in my bones and the events of the past few hours. But that didn't mean I was oblivious to my surroundings, as Rhys and Maya had presumed. The entire ride home, Rhys had quietly whispered a detailed version of the fight at school to Maya. I had caught her assessing gaze when Rhys had mentioned the ferocity of the punches, her eyes roving my body for injuries in quick flashes as she drove. Her way of silently checking if I was okay. I had simply stared out the window the remainder of the drive home.

The atmosphere had barely changed between the car and the living room. The clock mounted about the fireplace read 4:13. Jared and Ezra weren't due to finish their shift until 5. That gave me just under an hour to mentally prepare for the second fight of the day.

Except mere minutes later, the sound of keys rattling inside the lock resonated through the room. Hinges creaked, footsteps pattered, then the door slammed so hard the frame might have splintered.

"Bailey!" Jared roared.

Maya immediately rose and headed for the foyer where Jared and Ezra likely waited. My eyes followed my sister as she met them just outside the living room, still in my line of sight. Maya was saying something softly to Jared and Ezra, both boys a good few inches taller than their sister. But despite her size, Maya could be commanding, and demanding. Jared's eyes flickered over to were I was slouched in the couch beside Ivy. Maya's mouth moved in the form of a few more sentences before Jared stormed past her into the living room.

"What the hell is your problem!" Jared marched to the coffee table in front of me and swept his arm across half of its surface, scattering the contents onto the floor without a care in the world. He was much too angry to care now. Ezra took up his post leaning against the fireplace encase the situation escalated, which it would.

Jared sat on the edge of the coffee table and tucked his arms roughly under my knees, pulling me toward him so I was sitting up straight at eye level with him. Jared's voice reduced to a deadly murmur, which only heightened my nerves. "First, you leave this house at night without telling anyone where you're going. Then you decide to come home the next day, drunk off your ass. Then Rodger calls me to tell me he had to fire you, because you went to your shift completely intoxicated! And to top it all off, I get another wonderful call from your principle to say you attacked a girl today!" By the end of it, Jared lost his control and his voice rose significantly. "What the fuck is wrong with you!"

I averted my eyes from his, too much of a coward to face my brother. "I didn't start the fight," I said. Then realised that it wasn't supposed to sound like that.

"That's all you have to say?" Jared's eyes blazed as hot as the fire behind him. "I didn't start the fight." Jared repeated. "We'll that makes everything fine then, doesn't it? We can just forget about it all then, can't we, because you didn't fucking start the fight!"

"No, that's not what I meant, Jared. Please!" I pleaded. I had no more fight left in me, no more anger. "Please. You don't understand, I was defending myself! She attacked me!"

"People who defend themselves don't break five bones on the other persons face."

Maya audibly sucked in a gasp and Ezra swore softly. Rhys grabbed Ivy and strode out the room, Ivy's face drawn as she realised the building tension between Jared and I.

"I want to stay. I want to stay!" Ivy struggled against Rhys, forcing him to sling her over his broad shoulder and carry her away, all the while she companied.

Callused hands touching my own brought me back to the argument. Jared was inspecting my hands, my ripped knuckles that were still red and bloody, despite my efforts to stifle the bleeding.

Upon seeing my raw and gruesome knuckles, something broke within my brother and his anger vanished.

Jared sighed miserably and for the first time since dad died, a tear slipped down his cheek. "Why do you do this to yourself, Bailey? To our family? To me? You think I don't dread every time my phone rings, praying to all the Gods out there that you're not dead in a ditch somewhere. You think I don't lie awake at night worrying about my little sister spiralling out of control while I uselessly do nothing. This family is falling apart and nothing I do is stopping it!"

Jared ran his hands stiffly through his hair.

"I'm sorry." I croaked. My hands shook vigorously with emotion. "I'm so sorry." I cried. "I never meant to hurt anyone. I-I-I don't want everyone to hate me. I want us the be a family again. I-I'm sorry." Tears flowed freely down my face.

Jared carefully grabbed my wrists, mindful of the torn skin around my knuckles, and brought me into a hug. "I'm sorry too, Bean. For yelling, for getting angry. I'm sorry too."

And so, we sat their crying in each other's arms softly, overwhelmed by the past few weeks. Ezra and Maya were still silently in front of the fire place, watching us.

"I'm sorry for going out the other night, and I'm sorry for coming home drunk and not telling anyone and I'm sorry for losing my job and-and-and the fight-"

"Shhh." Jared soothed as he ran his hands up and down my back comfortingly. "I know. I know. We'll talk about the fight later. How about we fix up those knuckles for you, ay?"

All I could do was nod.

Jared lifted me onto the couch so he could stand, and we filed into the kitchen with Maya in tow. Ezra left to see how Rhys had faired with Ivy.

Maya rummaged around the kitchen to gather gauze and tape and cream. Jared stood next to where I was perched on the kitchen counter, watching Maya silently gather supplies.

"I'm going to take tomorrow off work. We all are." Jared held up a hand when I went to protest. "You guys are going to take the day off school, mum's going to take a day off and were going to spend a day as a family. Right now. We'll leave for Byron Bay at 7 tomorrow morning. No arguments, no excuses."

Byron Bay was a beach we used to visit often, before dad died. I was still frowning at Jared when he planted a kiss on the top of my head, then the top of Maya's. "I might even let you girls try and dunk me." A mischievous grin spread across Jared's face which was mirrored by the ones covering my face and Maya's. Since Maya and I were children, we'd had the challenge of trying to dunk Jared under a wave, but no matter how hard we jumped on him, the weight of Maya and I was never enough to sink our brute of a brother.

Perhaps life wasn't so bad after all.