Random bnha lemon one shots (trust me when i say random)

Deku x Endeavor x Shigaraki

i did not write this to be correct i know its fucking weird its fiction and its also like 4 years old

Deku was a crossdresser with the fake ID of Elizabeth McCarthy, a short woman with long, flowing blonde hair and who was often seen wearing dresses or skirts that went down to his mid-thigh. 

One day when Deku was at his normal job of crossdressing and going to that same place, Jimmy's bar every so often, he met the most handsome, sexy, and hottest person ever. That man was actually Endeavor but he wasn't on fire so he looked completely different than if he was on fire, not saying that Deku wouldn't still go after him. Deku would need Todoroki's dad's approval if he wanted to, well, you know. 

Deku's eyes couldn't help but look the man completely up and down, noticing every single tiny detail in this guy's form. His muscles were so large, defining, and bulging that Deku was instantly turned on like a light switch. 

Those muscles were not the only things that were bulging though. Endeavor had seen Deku (Elizabeth) from across the bar and had thought she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. He just needed to get to know her and get that number. That's where the bulging comes in.

Endeavor was drunk out of his mind, and so was Deku, so they were both harder than my science tests, though Deku had to hide that or else his sugar daddy, Endeavor, wouldn't take him home. Deku was used to hiding that while he was Elizabeth though, since one time he saw Todoroki when he was out and he was turNED ON HOT DAMN.

Anyways,

Endeavor and Deku eventually started talking, and soon enough, Endeavor suggested that he took Deku to his house. Deku said in a high pitched voice, "Oh yes of course, my not-flaming sugar daddy. May I ask your name, oh tall man that has made me wetter than an olympic sized swimming pool?" 

Endeavor replied, "Oh well, my name? My name is...Not Endeavor. First name is Not and my last name is Endeavor. Yes."

Endeavor then drunkly walked Deku into his car. Don't drink and drive, kids. its bad

Shiagaraki had been stalking Deku for the longest time. Remember his birth? Yeah he does too. Shigaraki had watched Endeavor seduce Deku and walk him to the car. Shigaraki was not about to let the chance of a lifetime slip through his disgusting, boney fingers. He broke into a sprint and yeeted himself into the trunk of Endeavor's car, completely silently somehow. 

Once they had all arrived at Endeavor's house, he took Deku into a secret soundproof room in the back corner of the house, so that no one can hear you scream. Shigaraki followed close behind, using his spiderman powers to climb on the ceiling, undetected.

Endeavor locked the door to the super secret room, putting the three of them into total isolation with each other.

Endeavor started to take off Deku's clothes, but was surprised when he saw that it was not the beautiful woman that he thought of, but was actually a 14-ish year old crossdressing boy.

Thats when he REALLY got turned on.

All of a sudden, as Endeavor was pulling down his pants, Shigaraki just fell from the ceiling because his spiderman powers just couldn't compete against Shigaraki's HUGE boner pushing onto the ceiling, and therefore pushing Shigaraki off of the ceiling.

Eventually there just was a threesome with Endeavor, Shigaraki and Deku, not forgetting all of the many moans that came from that room. 

Endeavor woke up the next morning only to discover that Shigaraki had decayed a hole into one of the walls and had crawled out of it to escape Endeavor's sleep farts and it had seemed that Deku had followed Shigaraki's path. Deku and Shigaraki then made out furiously after they had escaped Endeavor's fart oven room.

the end