With nothing to do after lunch, Mark headed back for the living-room and slumped over the sofa. It was weekends, and he wondered what Jinyoung was doing.
Sometimes he was confused about himself or rather, what he wanted. Especially concerned with Jinyoung. Was it out of sympathy or gratitude that he had been letting Jinyoung enter his life bit by bit? Yet he himself knew that it was neither of that.
Before, it might be true to say that Jinyoung had been clinging to him but now it was he who was clinging to Jinyoung. The question was if he was taking Jinyoung as a replacement for Hoon.
He had met and been friends with Hoon even before Jinyoung had come to them. At that time when there had been only two of them, he and Hoon, he had already developed his feelings for Hoon. When Jinyoung came, he had never looked at Jinyoung that way, because Hoon was already in his heart.
But sometimes he wondered whether things would have been different if it had been Jinyoung who he had met first.
Now Jinyoung was slowly replacing the parts in him where Hoon had originally been. In truth, it was he himself who wanted Jinyoung to make that replacement in his heart. And he was sticking to the fact, almost hopefully, that Jinyoung still loved him.
Yet he was somehow certain that one day Jinyoung would get tired of him. And he would wait for that day. Because if was better to let Jinyoung go when the latter wanted to, than causing the separation himself.
With some craving for hanging out with Jinyoung this evening, he dialed the latter's number but the call was not answered. At the second call, however, it was picked up.
"Hello, Jinyoung?"
"Jinyoung oppa? He's showering now. Is that Mark-ssi?"
Perhaps, she knew it from the caller ID.
"Ah, yes. Are you at Jinyoung's place, by the way?"
"Yes. I'll tell him that you called."
"B-But, are you in his room?" That was their privacy but he couldn't help asking that. He was even nervous to hear her answer.
"I'm in the living-room. Actually waiting for him as I want to accompany him to the orphanage."
"Orphanage?" Why would Jinyoung go there anyway?
"Yes, you don't know? He's volunteering there in Guro-gu, by teaching the children."
"No, I don't. Please tell him that I called."
He abruptly hung up the call. Teaching in an orphanage? Jinyoung had never told him about that. So Seoyeon knew that but he had not until now?
He was half upset and half angry with himself. Upset because Jinyoung had not let him know about that; they had met several times but Jinyoung had never brought it up. Furious with himself because as much as Jinyoung had tried to understand everything of him, he had never made any efforts to know more about Jinyoung.
It was a little after three when he drove to Guro-gu, with the desire to meet Jinyoung there and also as a kind of step to learn more about Jinyoung.
He had never been there, but when he arrived there, he saw it was a quite nice building for an orphanage. He mentioned Jinyoung's name to the receptionist and was informed that it would take another hour and a half for Jinyoung to finish.
"So he's teaching here. Could I know how long he has been?" Mark inquired of the receptionist.
"About one month already," she said, with a smile, "We're even asking him to extend his period to some more months here. Because, well, he's sort of a gifted person. He knows when to go soft or hard in dealing with the kids. We need such kind of teacher here. Besides, the kids like him and even prefer him to any of their previous teachers."
