No Escape

17

She couldn't sleep that night although she desperately needed it..haunting thoughts kept her awake. Her mind wasn't able to focus on one thing..on one hand she was extremely guilty and wanted to make everything normal between Jun Seo and herself..and on the other hand she wanted to repeat the whole cycle again. She knew it was crazy to even think about that, but she was crazy after all..
It was quite obvious that latter was not an option..
She never imagined that her love for Jaehyun would turn into hatred just in a few days...but did she really hate him? Maybe no..
That feeling was incomprehensible..she felt like every emotion she felt and was still feeling was a lie..
Everything was crystal clear but a part of her didn't want to understand anything.

She had known all along that she needed Jun Seo. If he wasn't there for her..she would have been dead by now. But she still couldn't get herself to love him. She hated herself for that but she had no control over it.
Her own thoughts were enough to frighten her..
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"We have to perform a surgery. There is swelling in her brain and the chances of haemorrhage are high...Please sign the form and submit the fee as soon as possible."

It was in the morning when they allowed him to see his mother. They told him that she was conscious and the surgery went well..

He entered the room and the sight in front of him pained him more than he expected..
The strong independent woman was now lying on the hospital bed with several different tubes and needles attached to her body..she was staring into space with half lidded eyes. She slightly moved her head to look at him. Pain was visible in her eyes as a tear welled up from the corner of her eye..

"Mom..how do you feel now?"

"It hurts..my head...gonna burst.." she squeezed her eyes shut.

"No..It's going to be okay. You are totally fine.."

She let out a groan..

"Do you want me to call the doctor?" he asked while taking her hand in his.

"No.." she pulled her hand away. "Just listen to me.." her voice sounded so week that it seemed almost unfamiliar to him. "My will is in the locker..in my office", she grimaced again. "Everything is clearly stated in it.."

"What are you saying? I'm calling the doctor." He said while trying to get up...

"No! Please don't!..they can't..do anything...can't perform the surgery again.." she mumbled as she reached for his hand.
"J-just please stay here..please don't call them..I'm fine.."

A sob escaped her mouth as she slowly rested her hand on his cheek and lightly caressed it with her thumb..

That caught him completely off guard and he slightly moved backwards. That little movement made her cry even more..regret was visible in her eyes. She pulled him closer and placed a chaste kiss on his forehead.

That simple gesture was completely new to him because this time he was the one at the receiving end..he felt like every wound was healing itself..like all shattered pieces of him were sticking back together...

Then her hand went limp and fell on her side..and blood started coming out of her nose. The zigzag line on the heart monitor was now flat...

The wounds were fresh again..he was broken again..and this time, the damage was permanent..

He repeatedly pressed the call button..
The doctor rushed into the room with a nurse and started checking for any signs of life, but found none..

"Brain aneurysm..." the doctor said to the nurse and she nodded..

"I'm sorry for your loss Jun Seo."

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