you're my hope ~MILEVEN AU~

v - the oblivious girl

Mike had no idea why Jane started ignoring him the following week. She would glance the other way in the hallways and had stopped turning up to the cafe when she was supposed to be volunteering, making Becky have to help Mike out instead. 

"Hey, Becky?" Mike mumbled one day as wiped down a table. They had discovered one day that Mike was good at cleaning up messes, particularly the ones that he had made. Shame that he couldn't seem to do that in other situations. 

"Yeah, sweetheart?" Becky's frizzy curls appeared over the counter and he froze, they looked so much like Jane's. Every little detail seemed to remind him of her, the caramel sauce that he pumped into a woman's mocha made him think of her eyes, and he felt like crying whenever someone asked for chocolate sprinkles. She must be really mad at him if she had stopped helping out at the cafe to avoid him, Mike knew she loved it there. 

"Why has Jane stopped coming? Is she ill? Have you spoken to her?" 

Becky frowned at the sad boy who kicked a chair lightly. "Has she not spoken to you at school? I thought you were in the same classes?"

"She's uh...been ignoring me" Mike confessed with a sigh, scrubbing a stubborn coffee stain. "Do you have any idea why?" 

"I'm afraid not, sweetheart. But she asked if she can change to Monday's and Friday's instead" Becky revealed quietly, noticing how the boy's face fell. 

Mike's gaze settled on his feet and he let out a dark chuckle. "When I'm not here, basically."

"Look, Mike..just speak to her at school. Find out what is bothering her...chances are that it has nothing to do with you" Becky assured him with a kind smile but it did little to ease the ache in his chest that missed her soft eyes, her button nose, her laugh.

"Yeah, maybe" Mike gave in with a forlorn sigh and continued to help clean up as the final customers left the cafe. 

Jane continued ignoring him at school, practically running out of class so that he couldn't follow her or try and work out what was going on. She asked Mr Clarke for help with biology so that she had something to do in her lunch hour. He had started helping her out, the pair eating sandwiches quietly and discussing the homework. Jane was glad that she was starting to understand science more but she just wished that Mike could be the one to help her study. 

She felt terrible for avoiding him and for seeing the look on his face when she walked away whenever he tried to corner her into talking. He was growing dark circles under his eyes from lack of sleep and his posture looked sluggish like he found it difficult to stand up. She missed him but she knew that it was for the best. He would eventually leave her once he realized how she would never be worthy of him, and it would break her heart. 

One day in class another paper ball landed on her desk in the middle of a quiz. This time Mike had aimed perfectly and it ended up on her desk on the first try. Jane hesitantly glanced at his desk from across the room where he gave her pleading eyes, nodding to the note as if begging her to pick it up and read it. 

Meet me in the AV room at lunch? Please. - Mike

She shook her head at him and continued to work, making him sigh. A few minutes later another paper ball landed on her desk and it made her jump, this time Mike did not look at her reaction. She gulped slowly and opened the note with trembling hands. 

I miss you - Mike

Her soft chin wobbled slightly but she forced herself to swallow, ripping the note in little pieces before shoving them on the floor. Blinking back tears, she didn't dare glance at his desk, too scared to see his hurt face. 

She missed him too, of course she did. But she didn't want to get attached when he was inevitably going to leave her for someone better. Just like her mom did. 

Jane's mom left her and the chief when Jane was nearly eight years old, leaving without so much but a note on the kitchen table apologizing. Jane listened to her dad argue on the phone every night with her, saying that it was unfair and cruel what she had done. She would sit at the table every night after dinner, watching out the window for her mom to come walking back up the path to the cabin ready to apologize and love them again. She often fell asleep at the table waiting, her dad always being there to carry her back to bed where she would wake up the next morning. What she taught her was that love fades away and that no matter how perfect you can try to be for someone, they will always look for something better. 

Mike was such a good person and Jane could not let herself get close enough to him to hate him one day when he left her behind for someone better. He was one of the first people at the school to try and get to know her and to treat her with kindness instead of giving her weird looks from across the class like everyone else. She didn't want to stay long enough for all of those good memories to turn sour when he got bored. 

I was a charity case for him. He felt sorry for me that day. Jane thought to herself, that's all. 

Mike shot up from his desk after class, leaving all of his books on his table before running after her angrily. 

"Jane! For god's sake, stop walking away!" 

His hand clamped down on her arm and she blew her curls out of her eyes, clutching her book to her chest tightly. She looked at her beat up pink converse, sighing heavily. 

"What is it?"

"Just stop ignoring me, I'm sick of this!" Mike's voice was rougher than she had ever heard and it made her wince, always used to him being so kind and gentle with her. But he was angry, and hurt underneath it all. 

"I'm not ignoring you" Jane mumbled and Mike scoffed. 

"Bullshit. You changed your days at the cafe to when I don't help out and you run away at every chance you get! You're ignoring me on purpose and I don't know why" his voice cracked at the end, making her look up into his eyes. 

They were the same dark brown eyes that were somehow filled with so much warmth despite how unhappy he was with her. They scanned over her with desperation, and he chewed on his lower lip. 

"Please, just tell me what I did wrong. Tell me and then I can make it right..." his voice was filled with panic and she closed her eyes tightly, shaking her head at the pain in his voice. 

"You didn't do anything" she muttered coldly, straightening up. "I just don't want you following me around anymore, is that too much to ask?"

"B-But.." Mike was at a lost for words, his heart aching as she spat out the harsh words. 

"You won't leave me alone! I just want time to myself, that's all. You've got other friends, go spend time with them" she groaned and ran a hand through her hair to hide the shake in them. 

"I-I thought that...you..uh-"

"What?" she scoffed lightly with a dark chuckle that made him wince. "You thought I..what?"

His face crumpled for a couple of seconds before it went blank, his fists clenching. "Nothing. Sorry to bother you, Jane."

He walked away angrily, kicking a locker on his way out and Jane's heart broke into a million pieces. 

xxx

Did I break your heart? That was the intention I'm afraid :( But I hope you liked a bit of insight into why Jane is ignoring him and about her past, it might not justify why she is being cruel but she is using it like a defense mechanism. I will be updating real soon! Stay tuned and I'm so glad you guys seem to be liking it!

Please feel free to vote and comment, it really does mean a lot to me. See you soon!

~Jodie