Be Alright

One

     One: Realizations

        The tips of my thumb nail scratch over the polish of my middle finger, picking the nude color off the nail. My eyes dart around the room, never settling on a single place for longer than a few seconds. I can feel eyes on me, but I avoid finding the owner of them.

    The last thing I wanted to be doing was looking at him.

     Actually, I didn't mind looking at him. His blonde hair is short at the sides and longer at the top and he wore it slicked back. It was never a favorite hair cut of mine on a guy, but he seemed to make it look amazing. His skin is pale, but not a snow pale. Just pale. His eyes are dark blue and covered with long lashes.

    I would kill to have long lashes like him.

    He easily stood a good four or five inches over my 5'6 frame. He lacks muscles, which always shocks me considering his job requires a lot of physical fitness.

    It also requires handcuffs, not that that is anything of importance.

      "You're going to mess up your nails if you don't quit," Haley, my best friend, whispered in my ears over the loud music.

     "It's a little too late for that, sis." I say back to her with a slight attitude, continuing to pick the nail polish all the way off of my nails.

      Haley rolls her eyes and slaps at my hands, making me stop the picking process.

     "You're freaking out over nothing. He totally likes you," Haley assures, taking a sip of her drink after.

      "I'm sure," I say in a sarcastic tone, darting my eyes back over to him.

      He laughs loudly to something that Anthony has just said to him. His face scrunches and up and his eyes close tightly. Only Anthony and I can make him laugh like that and I'm glad he has Anthony around to cheer him up.

      "Go talk to him. You've been avoiding him all night," Haley says to me.

      She is right. I have been avoiding him. I have my reasons though. One of them has to do with the girl at his apartment, waiting for him to leave the bar and come home. The other has to do with Haley pointing out him seeing me as more than just a friend.

     Two facts that definitely do not coincide with each other.

     "Haley, I love you, but you're going to make this worse than it already is," I tell her, still not meeting her eyes as mine are completely locked onto Jace.

      "And, Octavia, I love you, but you already made it worse by showing up here tonight. You knew what was going to happen when you told him you were coming," Haley snaps back, turning around in her seat to see exactly where I was looking at.

      She was right. Jace invited me and I said I would come. It doesn't make sense to avoid him all night.

      Then again nothing about Jace and I makes sense.

       "And besides, you guys are friends and have been for years. It isn't like it would be weird or anything," She tries to convince me.

       "Like it won't be weird? Sis, it wouldn't be weird if you didn't convince me that he and I had feelings for each other," I shoot back.

       Jace and I had always been good friends. But that was it - just friends. I had never looked at him more than that. I mean, we were very different from each other. I had a wild side, and he always followed the rules. I never saw anything in black and white, always looking for the gray in my answers in "what if?" while he wanted the yes or no answer. I was funny, and he was the laugher. We picked at each other constantly, but it was always in good fun I had thought.