Logs of the Inner World

3 - Blind date w/ prince charming

I'm floating around in school. I see a door which was stubborn to open, and I tumbled inside as it did. I ended up is some sort of ski lift cabin, which locked behind me.

It was going.. somewhere. Someone started speaking through the vehicle "Okay Lady Whosoever We Will Begin Our Journey To Your Rendezvouz With Your Suitor Lord Whosoever."

What. They have the wrong fucking person. I sound nothing like this lady whosoever. Well they will find out soon enough.

I end up in some dark tunnel full of rose petals and lanterns and probably overpriced bath salt i dont fucking know looks like some cheesy tunnel of love or shit. The voice started up again
"We will hand you your clothes to change into before u meet lord whosoever."

Ugh. Sounds like some rich bastard. I want nothing to do with that overly rich bastard with weird as fuck fancy traditions shoujo bullshit.

The boat stops. Two ladies have some kimono or something in their arms. They stare at me expectantly. I stare back at them.
"Uh..."

Then some dude walks out from somewhere. Given the attire I am in now (didnt get a good look, pajamas i think) I think it's pretty clear I'm not his lady whosoever. I sigh.
"Oh look mr.prince has arrived." trying to look as cocky as possible. Yeap, he does look like the stereotypical overly rich manga dude.

He asks how I got here.
"Look, I found some door in my school, I opened it and sort of fell in, then i ended up in ur vehicle or something nothing much man. So how do i get out of this place."
Dude: Ok. Lets start our date. -approaches all grins and stuff-
Me: woaaah you need to fucking CHILL mr fucking prince dude. Look man lady whosoever is gonna arrive anyway go take your elite aristocratic date or whatever with her.

I levitate as I frown. Yeah man look at this inhuman x-man shit. Not to be fucked with man.

Some woman appears on her boat. Must be lady whosoever.
"Oh look the princess has arrived."
She stares at me inquisitively. I bob down and go "uhhhhh" pretending to be a ghost and shit, since I'm already levitating. I don't why I thought it was a good idea.

I brought the whole ghost charade thing a step further as I.. turned into some spiderman creature and crawled around the ceiling..?

Dude no I'm supposed to be a ghost god-damn it Legna be more ghost-like.
(I call myself Legna in dreams sometimes, mostly when I'm looking at myself in 3rd person or when I start having a mind of my own.)

Legna.. just.. I don't know, merge with the wall and be a fleshy corpse wall-ghoul or something. Yes! Yes just like that, yeah you're a ceiling eldritch abomination yeap that looks like it. Okay you have roots spreading all over the place that's cool like some alien hive thing or something.

Hey. Touch the princess' foot with one of your tentacles or something that should freak her o- HOLY SHIT I SAID TOUCH HER NOT JAM HER THROUGH THE WALL. Holy shit is miss princess alive wait okay she is that must have been some really thin walls. but you didn't kill anyone so okay cool.

Okay. Looks like the situation is cool. Everything is under control. I think we can get the fuck out of here Legna. Let's leave this pl- LEGNA WHAT THE FUCK.

Apparently Legna was screaming all "THIS IS NOT THE END YOU JUST ENTERED THE CARNIVAL OF FEAR" or something and turned the whole cavern into some horror game bullshit. In the center there's a pillar with a brain-in-a-jar surrounded my more pillars with brains in jars. The brains seem to be connected to the pillars by their spines or something.

All the while my disembodied self was just going Legna holy shit stop wtf THIS IS SO FUCKING STUPID what is even the point of all this.

Yeah. the brains in jars thing is familiar. let me guess. mr. prince dude is gonna smash all those brains and slay you. I mean come on why the fuck are you going for tha- yeap, there goes one brain he just smashed one of your brains. I mean come on just turn back and get the fuck o-..

Oh who am I kidding. He ends up smashing all the brains the fucking end.