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Hi. This is a rant i just want to get this of my chest. I just saw this and I swear my heart fucking stop. I literally crying because of this. After what happened with Jjong it really just scares me anything about SHINee and EXO. I just it's just hard ever since Jjong died last year. It will be his death anniversary this December. And I don't know what to do this coming 18th. Every month I just relive everything what happened that night every fucking month, I cried every 18th day of the month. It's just there it's not leaving and it's been a year. I don't know what to do. It's been a year and seriously it still hurts. Someone told to let him go but i just can't let Jonghyun go. He's the reason why I'm still here. He's the reason why I'm still alive all these years. I've been with him for 7 years it's impossible to let him go. Before I stan EXO and met Junmyeon. Jjong is the one who lifted me up from that dark hole. Jjong and Myeon have a huge impact in my life. My moon and star. Now my moon is gone, all I have is my star and sky. My sky is Ji and my star is Myeon. I always look up whenever I feel down because I know they are looking at the sky that I'm looking at. I'm sorry for this. I just want to calm myself. If something grave happens to Minho I'll crash. I seriously hate December ever since Jjong.
