The Glitch

Chapter Eleven: I'm Here

I couldn't bring myself to fall asleep anymore than I could bring myself to forget about the events of that day. The more I thought about it, the more I wanted to forget. I had been heavily intoxicated that night, desire flooding through me like a tsunami.

I can't remember her name, but I knew she was of great importance to me. She was my everything, and I knew she felt the same way toward me. It was around the time I was first "born" when she came to mind. I couldn't get her face out of my head.

The sorrow in her eyes and the deep frown on her face sent me over the edge. My heart ached as the image painfully flashed into my mind once again. If only I knew what caused that beautiful woman so much strife.

I wanted to erase the picture of her in my mind. It hurt to see the tears glistening in her brilliant blue eyes. Her dark brown hair and fair skin under the light of the full moon. I wanted to forget. But every time I tried, my only success was an unbearable migraine.

It's like she was punishing me for hoping to forget about her. I shook my head vigorously, trying to push the image away and making myself dizzy in the process. I'd had one too many shots that night. I rubbed the sleep from my eyes, getting off the bar stool and heading out the door.

Obviously I wasn't in the best state of mind as I stumbled down the street and away from the loud music playing in the pub, but something made me stop in my tracks. Jerking my head to the side in a drunken manner, I was completely puzzled.

I dropped the beer bottle, glancing at it for a split second before lifting a hand up to my face and inspecting what was so salty on my lips. It couldn't have been the beer, so I was curious.

Tears. I was crying. "The fuck..?" I couldn't understand why salty trails left cold and shiny marks down my face as I kept walking, swaying slightly. The very thought of me crying made me scoff. I wasn't capable of feelings.

I wasn't capable of leaking a human substance used to express how sad someone really is. How broken someone really is, so I momentarily forgot about it as my vision doubled, preventing me from seeing so far in front of me. "Bloody Hell.."

I had to keep my hand on windows, doors or streetlights to keep myself from falling over and claiming the sidewalk as my new bed. It was never this difficult before. "The fuck is wrong with me today.." I slurred.

My face was red and soaked with tears by now as I held back a sob, my bottom lip trembling. I had never felt this way before.. yet it felt so familiar. I finally had had enough, letting out a frustrated growl, forcing myself to keep going. I was close to home.

-

A few drunken minutes passed and I looked to the right, seeing Sean's house, the porch light still on. I tripped on the last step up, catching myself on the door as I got back to my feet and opened it. The last thing I wanted was for my brothers to see me this way, so I immediately headed for my room. The very last door.

I grinned slightly, relieved that I actually made it home this time instead of bedding a tramp I randomly flirted with at the bar. I can never say no to a pretty face. My fingers grazed the door in the dark as I reached for the knob.

"Damn.." The rest of my sentence fell off into a grumble as I tried again, grabbing it and twisting. "Success!" The door creaked open, allowing me access to my room as I walked inside, my drunken haze slowly wearing off.

As soon as I shut the door behind me and hopped on my bed, I couldn't stop the tears anymore. My heart ached as I realized that I was truly alone. I hugged my knees to my chest, my broken sobs a little too loud.

That's when he showed up to comfort me. The man who had it all. He opened my door, poking his head inside with a small frown on his concerned face. "Anti? Are you okay?" Even his voice showed concern for my wellbeing. I was a fool.

I stopped immediately, shoving my head into my knees as he came in, not waiting for my answer. He sat on the edge of my bed, taking me into his arms and trying to console me as I weakly tried to push him away. "I'm only here to help, Anti.. just let me."

At the time, I didn't know only a few kind words would make me start crying again, but it did. I felt like someone was there for me and I accepted his tight hug, slowly wrapping my shaking arms around him as well. A mistake.

"I won't leave you. You're safe." A lie that I believed was truth as I sobbed into his shoulder, his shirt already soaked. How wrong I was to trust a human. I was supposed to be careful and I let my guard down because of a few simple words.

A few simple words that didn't have to mean anything to me, but they did. They meant everything to me because no one had ever given me the time of day. I was nothing, and that one moment of weakness proved it. After a while, my sobs turned into sniffles.

"Can you tell me what happened? You don't have to.." He didn't push me on the matter, but I knew he wanted to know more. Luckily, I wasn't that stupid. After a while of silence, he sighed. "I guess that's a no then.."

He finally let me go, patting my shoulder and giving me a reassuring look as I frowned, missing the comfort already. "I've got your back, Anti. No matter what.. I'll be there."

How wrong he was.