every step of the way // tom holland

birthing class

Sitting between Tom's legs, you leaned back into his chest. One of his arms was loosely hooked around your side, and he was using the other one to press against the mat so he could lean back and support his weight. You were currently at a birthing class with Tom. Quite honestly, you weren't really sure how it would go, but you were enjoying it so far. When you walked in, it looked like many of the couples were slightly older than you and Tom - they probably weren't in the same situation as the two of you - but it turned out you had more in common with many of them than you'd thought. It was nice to talk to other mothers who were going through the same things as you were, and you really were learning a lot.

Tom shifted his position behind you and leaned forward so his chin was resting against your shoulder. He gave a quick kiss to your cheek before turning his attention back to the instructor of the class. You knew he was doing his best to pay attention, but you also knew that he got bored pretty easily.

"Baby," you whispered after Tom pressed a few more kisses to your neck, causing you to giggle, "are you paying attention?"

"Yes!" he mumbled back with a small huff, "She was just explaining another type of breathing you can do."

This time it was you who let out a huff, not having caught him, "Fine, just-"

You were cut off when the teacher started speaking again, "Okay, so moms, this next one is something that your partners can help you with. It's a massage that might help ease some of the pain and help you relax during labor. Or at any other time, if you can talk them into it."

Letting out a laugh, you turned again to look up at Tom, "Promise you'll pay attention for this one?"

He gave you his warm smile, holding his pinky finger up to you, "I promise, my love, don't worry!" Your finger immediately hooked around his, and you both leaned in to press a kiss to the other's pinky, just as you had done all your life. His gaze had turned back to the teacher, and you watched for a few more moments - you could tell that he was serious, and he was actually concentrating so he could do this for you.

As the teacher began showing the class what to do for the massage, Tom began copying the moves. He sat back a little to make some room, and then you felt his hands pressed against your shoulders gently. Your head rolled back at the feeling of his hands digging into your muscles in just the right ways. You let out a quiet groan and let your eyes drift shut.

Per usual, Tom was quick to notice how you were reacting to it, and murmured quietly into your ear, "We should do this more often if you're really enjoying it this much, love."

You could hear the teasing in his voice, but you knew that he was telling the truth - he would do it for you if you made the request. You tilted your head back onto his shoulder and looked up at him, "Don't tease, cause you know I'll take you up on that, babe." He only gave you a smirk in response, pressing a kiss to your cheek with a playful hum. Tom's hands didn't leave your back for the duration of the class, his fingers still working into your skin to keep you relaxed.

Towards the end of class, the teacher announced that you'd be watching a video of a c-section. Your nose scrunched up at the thought - you knew that they were fairly common, but you didn't feel the need to watch a video of it happening. Even blood and needles made you feel sick, so you weren't sure how this was going to go. Tom's arms instantly slid around your middle protectively, knowing how you felt about all that kind of stuff. He leaned forward, his chin against your shoulder, his voice quiet, "Are you okay with this? We can go if you want, love."

You took in a deep breath and then shook your head, "No, no. It's okay. I should know, just in case." While you were hoping for a natural birth, things happened that you couldn't control, and you wanted to be as prepared as you could be. You leaned back against Tom's chest, head resting against his shoulder as the video started playing.

The regret was immediate, though, and you barely lasted a minute before your hands flew to your eyes, not wanting to see what was happening in the video. Tom gave you a gentle squeeze as his arms left your body to begin packing up the few things you'd brought with. Once everything was gathered, Tom helped you stand up so you could make your way out. Luckily, you were in the back of the room, so you didn't cause too much of a disruption. You gripped Tom's hand tightly in yours as the two of you walked out to the car, and your mind started racing. What if things went poorly? What if you had to have a c-section? What if there was something wrong with your baby? What if...?

Tom knew you well and could tell that you had a lot on your mind. His hand didn't leave yours until after he had helped you into the car. Once in the driver's seat, he leaned over and took your face in his hands gently. Your eyes met his as you took in a shaky breath, "Tom, what if something goes wrong? What if our baby isn't okay? What if I need a c-section? What if something goes wrong with me? What if-"

Tom's head shook quickly and he cut you off as the pads of his thumbs rubbed across your cheekbones, "Hey, hey. Stop that. Everything will be okay. Take some deep breaths, like you just learned, yeah?" He was looking at you intently and you couldn't help but nod, slowly breathing in and out like they'd taught you in the class. After a few deep breaths, with Tom doing them along with you, you started to feel a bit more relaxed. "Everything will work out, okay? You will be okay, and our butterfly will be okay. I'll make sure of it."

Nodding again slowly, you lifted your pinky finger up to his. And for the second time that day, Tom's finger hooked around yours. "Love you, Tom. You keep me sane, ya know?"

Tom laughed softly, pulling you in and pressing a kiss to the tip of your nose, "Love you too, baby. Don't know what I'd do without you."