Other Sanders Sides One Shots

I Wish

Synopsis: Logan manifests as the first side, before Thomas is even one year old. He can't handle emotions.

Trigger warnings: Intense gore; It gets really dark really fast towards the end

He woke to blackness.

Logan knew, somewhere in the back of his mind, that he was in the Subconscious. The net cradled his body, making it difficult to move, murky black smoke drifting in through the holes. He was quickly losing air. He was just created, and now he was going to die.

He reached blindly forward and gripped onto the net, hauling himself up. Just that move alone took most of his energy. He forced himself to climb, though, climb higher and higher until he crawled his way out of the Subconscious, and into the Mindscape. The Mindscape was miles and miles of pale nothingness.

It was all very blurry. I wish I could see better, he thought, and then glasses appeared on the floor. He put them on, and his vision turned clear.

I wish I knew what was going on. A journal appeared.

He sat criss cross and pulled it into his lap, flipping it open. It was a scrapbook. The first picture was of an infant, captioned Thomas Sanders; 4/24/1989. The last picture was, startlingly, of Logan. It was captioned Logic is born, with a date six months after Thomas's birthday.

Logan glanced up as a small, boxed TV appeared in front of him. It was Thomas's eyes. He was trying to stand up, gripping onto the bars of his playpen.

"You have to pull," Logan said, "to get yourself to your feet."

Thomas immediately listened to him, and stood up, putting most of his weight on the bars. Logan beamed.

As Thomas's mom came in and started squealing, Logan looked to the side, where a floor length mirror now stood. He furrowed his eyebrows, dropping the book and walking over.

He didn't look like Thomas. He was... Older. Much older, by a couple of years. He was dressed in denim shorts and a dark blue sweater vest. If he really thought about it, he guessed he saw the resemblance, like maybe he was Thomas in a few years. But that didn't really make sense to him. Why would Thomas travel back in time to sit inside his own skull?

A few hours later, Thomas's dad laid him down for a nap. I wish I had somewhere to sleep, too.

Then, the Mindscape morphed into a small bedroom, with navy walls. There was a bookshelf, a desk, and a bed, with pajamas folded neatly on top.

Logan fell into his role easily. The only thing that confused him, maybe even upset him, was that he was the only one there. He was entitled 'Logic,' so why was he handling the emotions, as well? He didn't like the emotions. They were scary, and unpredictable.

One time, Thomas was hungry, and Logan didn't know how to get his parents' attention. He were in his crib, alone. Logan thought maybe making some noise would attract them, so he told Thomas to throw a toy. It smashed against the wall, which eased Logan's frustration some, but scared Thomas so badly he started crying. Logan told him to break another one. Thomas broke three toys before his mom finally burst into the room, taking him downstairs to get something to eat. Logan noted in his journal that making noise led to receiving care, although something told him he didn't handle that as well as he could have.

One emotion Logan never hated was curiosity. He didn't even know if he could call it an emotion, because it was predictable. If Logan didn't know or understand something, he felt the need to figure it out. Simple. Easy. Predictable.