Beauty and the Beast

Doe Eyes

The old women call me "Doe Eyes" in the village sometimes, when my girlfriends aren't around. They say they don't want to upset them or make them think they favor me. 
I have the prettiest eyes in the village. Everyone says that. They say that if I were to become an actress, I would go far because of my beauty.
I wonder if you knew that, Reinhard. I wonder if that's why you picked me to be the object of your twisted desire, and not any other Slovak or Czech girl.

Two Czech women came to get me after a while, both chubby and looking well fed. One of them I recognized from the village, Anna Curda. She was our neighbor across the street, and had two children, boys named Jaroslav and Karel. Her husband had been one of the people executed during the purges that took place when you assumed power. Your soldiers forced her to watch as they made him dig his own grave and then shot him.
They took me to a large washroom and helped me into a steaming hot bath. I was confused as to why I was being forced to take a bath, but was too terrified to ask. And being scared exhausted me.
They scrubbed at my skin until it was red, then helped me out of the tub and dried me off. 
I was given a basic looking velvet maroon dress with a neckline that plunged to my mid-chest, offering a teasing view of my cleavage. I, however, said nothing or did nothing—I wasn't afraid of Anna, but of her pinch faced companion. Anna would never collaborate with the Nazis after what they had done to her family, but for all I knew this lady ought to be a collaborator—at most an informer or a spy.
Warning signs immediately began to flash in my head when they sat me down and one  began to heap an almost surreal amount of makeup on my face, while Anna proceeded to style my hair.
I looked like an actress when they were all done and let me look in the mirror. I had never been allowed to wear makeup before, and just seeing myself looking so beautiful sort of turned the fear gripping my heart into a blend of awe and giddy excitement.
They were packing up their things when all of a sudden Anna, who had been styling my hair, grabbed my arms and pulled me into a tight embrace.
"You must be brave, my girl," she said into my ear. "You are on the threshold to a dark and torturous path. You must be strong, and you mustn't let them break you."
I didn't know it at the time, but she was talking about you all along, Reinhard.
"What do you mean?" I asked her. "What's going to happen to me?!"
"I can't tell you that," she said. "I'm under orders not to talk to you about anything. Just whatever happens, do as they tell you. Resisting them will only get you in trouble."
She gave me a final, unreadable look before her companion pulled her through the door and they were gone.
I stood all alone in the middle of the room, staring at the now empty doorway, whatever joy I had felt previously now morphing into sheer terror. What was going to happen to me? Why was I being dolled up like an actress or a cabaret dancer?
It didn't help that I now realized what emotion had been omnipresent in Anna's gaze when she looked at me for the last time.
It was fear.