Homestuck Sickfic Drabbles

Grimdorks allergies

Anonymous Asked: can i have a johnrose fic where john is allergic to jaspers? i really like sneezing and sniffling! :) maybe as a plot he denies that he is? but the rest is up to you!

John volunteered to make dinner for Rose instead of going out. He was curious to see her home for the first time, seeing as though they were dating now. Grilled cheese and canned soup wasn’t exactly gourmet, but it was tasty and probably just as good as what they could afford at a restaurant would be. 
After promising not to start a fire (Seriously, what kind of cook did she think he was? John Egbert was an expert chef!), he convinced Rose to leave him in her kitchen until the food was completely finished. The few ingredients required were there, now all he needed to do was cook. Easy! Except for one thing: an affectionate cat.
As he made dinner John sniffled miserably, watching as jaspers rubbed up against his leg. Ugh. It felt like his nose tickled more and more the closer the little feline got, and cooking with a runny nose was not easy, either. Occasionally he’d try to nudge the cat away with his foot, but he’d just come right back.
"Meowwww…"
"Go away!"
"What was that, John?"
"Uh, nothing!"
Finally the food was done and John thought that he was saved from his misery. However, eating dinner just made John more interesting to Jaspers. The cat rubbed against his legs and then sat down to watch him as he ate several times. And John was gradually getting more miserable. As the two ate dinner, he was putting his sleeve up to his nose just to keep it from dripping, There were times where his nose would itch so much and he would try to sniff to keep from sneezing. That worked; for a little while, that is.
"Hih-HATSCH! TSH!" he noticed the itch remained deep in his nose as he rubbed it once more, before looking up at his girlfriend. 
Rose raised an eyebrow “I hope you’re not catching cold.” she commented with slight concern.
"No! Definitely not, I’m alright." John hoped his dripping nose didn’t make this statement less convincing. 
"Uh huh…" Oh God, he hated that look. It was the look she gave him as she examined him, scanning him like a computer.
"It’s not a cold, I promise." Well, that was true. What he forgot to mention when he came to her house was the fact that he was allergic to cats.
Washing dishes was just as difficult for John, as he tried his hardest to keep his nose from visibly running. This meant that he was constantly sniffling, and it felt worse with Rose in the room with him.
Suddenly John panicked as the itch in his nose spiked. He buried his nose into his shoulder as an attempt to stifle the oncoming explosion, but it was no use. “Hehhh…..hehTSCH!” His face turned a dark shade of red when he saw Rose jump at the sound. “Sorry, I- TSCHEW! heh..heh..HCHST!” 
"John?"
"I’m - snf! - I’m good now.” Lie. His nose was still dripping, and it was getting harder to control, especially with dishwater-soaked hands and a cat who chose now to jump up onto the counter and brush against him. Thankfully, Rose realized what was going on. 
"Jaspers, get down!" 
The cat’s eyes widened before he jumped down and ran out of the kitchen.
Rose threw a towel in John’s direction, which was caught with a swift-looking move and used by John to dry his hands. “Well,” Rose began, “Bless you.”
"…Thanks."
“‘I can’t come over because I become nothing but a pile of snot when I’m around cats, Rose’, Would that be hard?” She asked teasingly, “You’d better get home before you stop breathing.”
As guilty as it made him feel, that was relieving “Next time I cook for you it’ll be at my h- hatSCHOO! snf! my house. Sorry I didn’t say anything.”
"I’m afraid I’m allergic to VHS tapes and bad movies." 
"…I think that I’m less sorry now."