Aftermath (new feeling sequel)[Completed]

Alchol makes the pain go away

Im sorry once again for the last chapter, it was shitty and short and I ain't happy with it but once I finish the story ill do an entire edit of it probably!
also the first half is zee's p.o.v  with a time laps but also Brian's is too but a slightly different time laps where it starts a day before the funeral if that makes sense. but both laps to after, Gawd I hope that makes sense xL
Either way triggers!!!!!

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zacky's p.o.v

brian just left. I sobbed loudly I couldn't believe Jimmy was gone, he couldn't.

I just sat with Matt and Val for the longest time until the rest arrived. All the guys, Johnny, larry, the berry's and leana came over. No one expect Brian wanted to be alone and no one wanted to face going over to his house.

We sat around sharing some beers and sitting in almost silence. We relized how much we had relied on jimmy for his amazing outbursts of energy.

I felt the need to drink more and more to try forget this. I don't want to know anything. I just need to forget this pain deep inside me.
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time laps

I sat alone on our bed for the hundredth time in the last few days. I wore a all black suit and tie and now the familiar beer bottle in my hand. I haven't been sober in days and reality hit me like a ton of bricks as I replayed them lowering his coffin earlier this morning.

I cared for nothing or nobody only alchol. When Brian returned after his walk he seemed so distant but I was just too drunk to care. I couldn't help it. It was then I heard a knocking on the door into the room.

"zee?" Brian's voice came through the door . I didn't answer him but he came in anyway.

"zee?" he said again but I tried to ignore him.

"zacky please talk to me all you've done is drink. Please talk." he pleaded.

" no." is all I said I didn't want to. Alchol made my pain go away.

"zee you think alchol helps but it doesn't it makes it worse.."

but I cut him off from finishing his rant.

"no shut the fuck up!  you have no right!you are a hypocrite you're the one who tried to drink your problems away before. I don't need advice from you, you caused as much pain as him dying too you  know that! you caused so much fucking pain and now here you are trying to 'give advice' well you can't so shut the fuck up and leave. "

I couldn't stop myself, I don't know if it was the alchol or what but I regretted its.

Brian just looked exactly like when Matt told us about jimmy. He was hurt  as if ever word wad a dagger to his heart. But the alchol made me a dick. I got us and brushed past him and straight out of the house and to find a bar. I needed another drink.
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Brian's p.o.v

I don't know what to do. I can feel a whole deep within my heart and it aches constantly. I don't know how many times I've ended up in the same scenario with a blade in one hand contemplating breaking the skin one more time to hope that the blood lost with take away my pain with it  but I don't I remember Zacky and the guys and then I through away the blade. I must keep strong for them but I don't know what to do.

Zacky has been drinking too much but I don't know how to stop him, I know what it's like to want to drink away the pain but it doesn't work and it never will all I know of now is to try be strong I must try be strong for him
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time laps still Brian's p.o.v  (just after zee's p o.v)

"no shut the fuck up!  you have no right!you are a hypocrite you're the one who tried to drink your problems away before. I don't need advice from you, you caused as much pain as him dying too you  know that! you caused so much fucking pain and now here you are trying to 'give advice' well you can't so shut the fuck up and leave. " (a.n sorry its bold I was lazy)

and with that he left. I felt like back when we where on tour and his words cut through me like knives in butter.

My world felt like it shattered once again for the second time today. Jimmy had been my best friend through thick and thin and I loved him so much, and it hurt so badly to see him gone forever never would he and I do a solo again or share a cigarette or even torment Johnny. It was all gone and now I think I've lost zacky too. He hates me. I've lost the two most important things in my life all in one day.

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one ..
two ..
three ..
four..
five ..
six...

I counted each deep cut for the second time today. I had broken my promise but I couldn't stop myself. maybe I don't understand, Zacky chose alchol as his relief and I chose mine, both as bad as eachother in large dosages.

I quickly wrapped up my cuts in bandages and made my way to the spare room. I didn't want to sleep in our bed not tonight.

As I lay there I tried to sleep but i couldn't fine it. I just lay staring at the ceiling hoping this pain will go away.
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sorry! !
I know Im a sick fuck who always causes pain on Brian but im sorry okay you have to deal with it okay! okay.
anyhoe please vote and comments what you think? :D also the usually mistakes etc.
love E xxxx