Amaranthine - JENLISA (completed)

AWAKEN

"What  is this Seung Hyun? Why are you with her?" I asked him one more time.  "I can't tell you Lisa. The moment you've decided to surface, was also  the moment I can't do anything about what you do up there." He said.  "But you never told me anything prior to that. All you blabbered about  was how it is going to be a bad idea. If you aren't going to tell me,  I'm going to find out on my own." I said as I closed my eyes and went  back up to earth.

This  time, I was not as confused. It's like my consciousness mellowed down  but still, The people around me had different dimension surrounded but  none of them are aware of that of course. As they walk by thinking about  themselves, their past, present and future were all quite the same.  People are not even aware that they have lived the same lives more than  once already. At least the souls that chose to did. However, in return,  they will have no recollection of their previous memory. It is as if  living a brand new life in a parallel where they are born again.

However,  there are times where the soul remembers. Déjà vu if I may say. They  feel like the thing they were doing already happened but they couldn't  figure out when and it's because it did happen but in their previous  lives. It's a recollection of memory that surfaces from time to time.

Should  I start revealing myself to Jennie and get to know her? I feel like I  should observe her more before I do it. What she's like and how she is.  The people around her and what not. I'm starting to think that there's  more to it than what my scroll order says obviously. With things that  are happening now, there's a possibility that there's more to it than  simply collecting.

I  close my eyes and think of Jennie so I can be where she is. A white  light flickered as my body fades and evaporates into thin air. It was  weird because it never happened before. I'm starting to think if these  so called privileges are actually it. Because it's confusing and there's  a lot of things that are yet to known and I ought to find that out.

I  ended up in a house with bright yellow paint on the walls. I walked  around and found myself in the living room. Familiar. That's the first  thing I noticed but there's also a feeling of warmth on top of it all.  Warmth, I've never felt it before but I knew what it is now. I've always  had little conversations with the souls I collect as they pass. One of  the things they miss the most when they were still alive were warmth.  But, why am I feeling it now?  It's like I'm living but I'm not.

The  sense of smell for one thing. I was able to smell the sweet aroma scent  of the petals that fell from the sky. It was the same scent that's been  lingering in this house too. I've realized that it might be Jennie's  scent. But why does it give me mixed emotions? I remember the pain I  felt the first time I'd seen her. It was almost unfathomable. I couldn't  control it and I don't understand it.

Is  God allowing me to feel things as part of the mission? But why is it  being directed to Jennie? The moment I saw her, I felt like I knew her.  Somehow. There's something I couldn't explain. Something about her that  seemed so knowingly. But it filled me with pain and sadness. I felt I  was living and breathing and I couldn't explain it and then there's  Seung Hyun who seem to be so alive and involved with Jennie's life.

"Lisa-ssi  get your ass up and help me out here." Someone from behind me said as  it made me feel befuddled. Did she just call me? I turned around and saw  Jennie wearing an apron as she puts her her hands on her waist. "Aish  but I want to sleep some more." Someone answered.  The woman wore a  yellow hoodie that almost matched the walls of this house. The hoodie  covered her face as she walked towards Jennie but what's even weird is  that I can't see neither this woman or Jennie's past and present  infinites.

It's  like their lives are non-existent in other dimensions and I was  starting to feel bad things the moment Jennie called this woman Lisa.  That's my name too and I almost thought she sees me and know me. "Are  you going to be sleeping all day knowing that I'm here?" Jennie asked as  her hands travelled and wrapped around the womans waist. "Of course  not, I've missed you." The girl said and kissed Jennie on the lips.

I'm  positive now that she's in a relationship with this woman. But what's  even crazier is that somehow, this woman felt familiar too. Her  physique, her voice, everything. If my suspicions are correct, That  woman right over there, is me. Is it really me? I'm alive in this  dimension? What kind of game is this? Is my mission completely about me  rather than Jennie? Is it about Seung Hyun? Or is it about the three of  us?

Jennie  pulls the womans hoodie down and what I saw validated everything. That  woman is me. Or so I think it is. "What are you making?" I saw myself  ask Jennie and the unthinkable happened. I saw myself in the physical  body of the woman that looked like me. Her body became mine, her eyes  were my sight and her emotions became mine.

For  the first time, I felt a humans touch. I felt Jennie's warmth better  than the warmth I felt the moment I've gotten into this house. I felt  like I belonged and I had this urge to hug her so bad and so I did.  "Hey, hey, what's wrong? Why the tight hug all of a sudden?" She asked  me and I remembered, This body is mine. "I don't know, but I feel like I  haven't seen you for thousands of years and I really miss you." I said  as it was the truth. It felt exactly like that and it hurt. It hurt a  lot.

Jennie  however smiled at me. It's that smile that'd totally make your heart  tug. Everything was familiar and little by little I think it's starting  to give me hints. Minor flashbacks. The moment I hugged her and felt her  body on mine, I instantly remembered the time she cooked for me for the  first time. Déjà vu. A recollection of memory. I have it and I was  beginning to slowly realize this really bigger than I thought. This was  me. This is me. "I only have time today and I won't be able to come for a  while." Jennie said as she tugs and plays with the hem of my hoodie.  "How come?" I asked. "It's getting harder to sneak away from Seung  Hyun-Oppa. He's been controlling all of my projects and there's no free  time." She said and sighed as she buries her head on my chest.

I  gulped as I began to ponder. What does Seung-Hyun have to do with any  of this? I brushed Jennie's hair as I lifted her chin up to face mine  like it was the most normal thing to do because it felt like it. "Why do  you let him do that to you?" I asked her. "He's my manager and my  brother Lisa. He's the only family I have. You know this." She said and  closed her eyes. "But I'm your family too." I said not realizing how it  came out of me but I had another flashback.

It  was Seung Hyun, Jennie and I playing together in what seemed like an  orphanage. The three of us were inseparable. Like the three musketeers, I  felt happy at that flashback. We didn't have parents but we had each  other. Seung Hyun and I bickered a lot but treated each other like  family. A real one. I guess even in the underworld we were like that  since he's my partner but something changed and that's where the  flashbacks stopped. "You are." Jennie said. "You're my home and this is  ours." She said as she kisses my lips. Kisses that felt so intimate.  "And you are mine." I said as I caressed her cheeks as I brushed my  thumbs lightly on her face.

I  looked into her eyes trying to see if I'd get any more flashbacks but  there's nothing. But I felt love, pain and longing all at once. It was  unbearable and I felt I was about to explode with emotions any time.  "I've really missed you so much." I told her as I enveloped my arms  around her body and kissed her forehead. "Can we stay like this for a  little while?" I asked her. "I don't know when I'll get to do this  again." I said as she returned the gesture and held onto me tenderly.

And  with that, I felt myself dissolve into thin air. Leaving the physical  body I once had. Leaving Jennie in this world as I stood by away from  her. I saw myself still holding her but this current version of myself  isn't anymore. It was unbearable. It's like this lingering wave of  emotions building up inside of me. Things were starting to unfold and I  don't know If I'm able to handle it. I knew at that moment that in this  life, Jennie meant the world to me. What hurts is that now, this version  of me, the reaper, knew was going to die.