I Was Joking

Well Alrighty Then

Patrol in itself was pretty basic; the occasional mugging, gave a couple autographs, shutting down a mafia heist... The usual. There was a lot of taking drunk kids home though. There must have been several parties going on to ring in the weekend.

Peter was just casually swinging around when he noticed another one. This kid--who was very obviously wasted--was fumbling as he walked towards his house. He sighed and dropped next to the high schooler, only to realize who it was.

Flash.

Spider-Man kept quiet, simply giving the teen support when it was blatantly obvious he would fall over otherwise. It was a good five minutes until Thompson decided to start a conversation.

"Ssso. There's this kid, right? His n'me's Peter. He said he knows ya. Issat true?", Flash asked, stumbling over his words about as much as he did his steps. "Yep. We're pretty close. He actually designed the OG gear, and is always working with Stark to improve it.", Peter answered in a deeper voice. Might as well humor the guy. "Huh. Fig'red. He's smart. And nice. And kinda cute, in da dorky way, 'ut don' tell him I said that."

Parker froze for a moment. Well, that caught him off-guard. "Y-yeah?", he asked, catching up with Flash.

"Yup.", the boy affirmed with a shy smile and slight blush. "Hez gotta cute brain, cute eyes, cute curls, cute smile." Parker bit the inside of his cheek, unsure how to process this information. Rather than focus on it, he kept his attention on getting Flash home safely. "You live near here?", he asked, voice laced with concern.

The teen nodded again. "Kinda. Live in a big house. Shouldn't be too far off." Peter started looking around, keeping an eye out. "So, uh, how long have you known Peter?"

Call him immature, but this is pretty damn big, in his opinion.

"S'nce middle sch'l. He sat at the back of the class with his friend, Reeds. He answered a q'stion I didn' get the answer to and smiled a little. Sent me head over heels.", Flash described, smile getting a little bigger. Peter remembered that moment too. The day after is when he started getting...those...notes...

Oh, this is just too good.

"So, I did s'methin' that probably sent those chances d'wn the dr'n. Pushed him 'round. Bu' I was kind of following a weird sense of logic. My dad hits m' mom, but they're married, and people love each other when they're married, so if you love someone, hit them. In hindsight, tha' was stupid.", Flash explained with a shrug.

"'fter I realized tha', I knew people wouldn' like me havin' a boy crush, so I pretend to hate 'im. Call 'im mean things, but that's only to make sure he doesn' notice someone else. 'oo late, tho. He's already got a boyfr'nd.", he slurred, looking up.

"You mean his friend? No, they're not dating." Peter questioned, supporting Flash again as they made the turn onto his street. "No? Huh. Had me fooled."

"Well, I'm sure if you apologized, he'd appreciate it. Maybe even give you a chance.", Parker offered as Flash's glazed eyes lit up at the sight of his house. "Ya thin'?", Flash asked, looking hopeful. The kid wore his heart on his sleeve when he was like this. Peter gave an earnest smile underneath his mask.

"Maybe.", Spider-Man shrugged, letting Flash go. "Hey, 'ember. Shhh.", Flash held a finger to his mouth. "Don' tell Parker."

"I won't.", the hero promised, crossing his heart before jumping onto the nearest roof.

He stopped for a moment, taking in the conversation. While that happened, the teen overheard his school bully vomit rather hard in the front garden.

"Man. I be' this was how Parker felt after that field trip with th' spider...bite."

A moment of silence.

"Holy shこt."

Another moment.

"Oh fんck."

And finally...

"Yeah, I'm not going to school on Monday. Fにck. I regret everything. Whelp. Guess I'll die. Of fちcking course he is. God dammit. Fはck."

Peter gave a little giggle, before his laugh trailed off. He swung off again, now in thought about how Eugene Flash Thompson is the tsundere of the century.

That made for an intriguing thing to think about over the weekend.