The Neutral Soul--Hozuki x Reader (Hoozuki no Reitetsu)

Chapter 15

(F/N) rubbed her hands over her eyes, and leaned back in her chair with a sigh. She and Hozuki were working late, and, having gotten a good night's sleep every night for months, (F/N) could no longer take the strain.

She forced her eyes to focus on the desk, and went back to work. Reading the papers, and either stamping them with her seal, or putting them in the 'rejected' pile.

Once she was done with her pile, she looked over at Hozuki. With (F/N) only being his assistant, she'd been given half as much work as him. Chances were, he would still be working for another hour or so.

(F/N) weighed the options in her head, and, cursing how unselfish she'd become, she picked up her chair, moved it to his desk, and plopped down next to him.

"Let me help you with that."

"No," Hozuki replied. "You look like you're about to fall asleep."

"I'm fine," she insisted.

She tried to take one of the papers, but he put a hand over hers.

"I'm not going to let you risk your health," he told her. "Go to bed."

(F/N) froze.

"H-hozuki-kun..."

"Hm?"

She jerked her hand back, a smile on her face. "Never mind. Good night."

"Good night."

She hurried out of the office, rubbing her hand.

She ran down the hall to her room, and collapsed face-first into her warm bed, letting out a content sigh. Almost immediately, she fell asleep, having forgotten to take her medicine.

(F/N) ran through a dark abyss. She didn't know what she ran from, but she knew it was bad.

A bullet struck her ankle, and she collapsed onto the ground, a burning pain pulsing through her body. Her hand struck something soft, and she opened her eyes to meet the face of Tadaima Kuro, the first man she'd killed with the Yakuza.

She screamed, and forced herself to run, wincing at the pain. She ran until another gunshot rang out, and felt pain explode in her shoulder. She fell on her back, and turned to face her faceless attacker. They pointed a gun at her forehead, finger on the trigger.

No! Her mind shouted. I have to live! I don't know why, but I have to live for something!

Her body moved on its own. Her arm reached into her jacket, and pulled out a familiar pistol.

Her blood froze at the sight of it, but the little voice still echoed in the back of her head, urging her to live.

She pointed the gun, and her finger tightened on the trigger, but somehow, it slipped off at the last moment.

A beam of light shone from above, illuminating the pistol.

It was covered in blood.

(F/N) drew back, dropping the gun in horror. The light from above grew, revealing bodies upon bodies. Each one was a face (F/N) recognized. Fujioka Natsume, Hiro Tanaka, Shiro Chidori. The names echoed through her mind like a mantra.

When she turned her eyes back to the faceless figure above her, she found that it, too, had been illuminated. Now seen clearly, (F/N) realized it was her sister hanging from a noose, bullet wounds peppering her chest and stomach.

(F/N) opened her mouth, but no sound came out.

No, she was supposed to have survived! Someone told me she survived! Someone important...

The finger of Ai's corpse tightened on the trigger, and, as she prepared to have her head blown off, (F/N) let out one final scream.

(F/N) woke to the sound of her scream echoing off the walls. She stumbled to her feet, her ears ringing, and tried to reach the door, but soon crumbled to the ground. Her chest was tight, and she could barely breathe. It hurt, and her mind was a muddled mess. She didn't know which to believe—the dream, or reality.

There was a knock on the door, and she could hear Hozuki's voice.

"(F/N)-chan, are you all right? I'm coming in."

The door slowly opened, casting a beam of light across the room. When Hozuki saw (F/N) collapsed in the middle of the floor, tears staining her cheeks, his face betrayed a hint of surprise.

Relief washed over her. She reached out to him, and he immediately engulfed her in a tight hug.

The minute he touched her, she felt herself relax. Still struggling to breathe through her shaking, she gripped his yukata in her fists. Hozuki gently rubbed her back, forcing her muscles to unwind.

"It's okay," he murmured. "I'm here. You're safe."

(F/N) nodded, forcing her lungs to take in a deep breath of air.

"Ai," she gasped. "Ai's alive, right?"

"Yes," he told her. "Your sister is alive."

Her grip on his yukata tightened. "And you? You're alive?" She knew it was a stupid question, but she felt the need to ask.

"Yes," he assured her. "I'm alive. I'm right here."

As her heart rate gradually slowed, she let go of his clothing and snaked her arms around his waist. Hozuki moved to a more comfortable position, sitting on the floor and setting her in his lap. It reminded (F/N) of all the times she'd sat in his lap while they watched movies together.

"Hozuki-kun," she murmured into his chest, her mind gradually becoming foggy. "Will you stay with me?"

"Yes. I'll stay as long as you need me."

Forever?

(F/N) didn't dare say the word out loud.

Her mind drifted back to her dream, not affected by the horror of it as long as she was in Hozuki's arms. She'd had dreams like that several times before, and she always gave into the fate of dying, weighed down by all of her previous sins. That was the first time she'd fought back. The first time she had something to live for, and that something was Hozuki.

Surrounded by his warmth, she drifted off to sleep.

Bonus! Hozuki's point of view:

(F/N)'s breathing slowed, and Hozuki realized she'd fallen asleep. Her expression softened, morphing into something almost like a smile. It had been a long time since he'd seen her smile genuinely, and he hoped he would see it one last time before her judgment in three weeks time.

Hozuki contemplated moving her to the bed, but didn't want to risk her having another nightmare. He spent all night working on a regular basis. He could hold her until morning.

He felt her grab his yukata, and looked down, expecting to find her awake, but her eyes were still closed. She wore a soft, warm smile.

"Hozuki..." she mumbled. "I love you..."

Though he knew she was dreaming, the words brought some sort of warmth to his heart, and he bent down to press a kiss to her forehead.

"I love you, too."