The Fear She Couldn't Face

Chapter 7

*Five days later*

Since all my clothes had been destroyed, I had to go buy new ones. Which wasn’t very hard. I just got the exact same as I had before.

Getting dressed for stage two of initiation. The emotional stage. Each are put under a simulation and they have to face their fears. And to end the simulation, they have to calm down and have a steady heartbeat. In turn, not being afraid.

Since I didn’t have to worry about getting sweaty during training today, I decided to wear a tight, black, knee length dress with my boots, putting on my make-up as well. I had put my hair in a braid the night before, so my hair was wavy. I needed to be as convincing as possible.

After I finish getting ready, I walk to his apartment. Not knocking on the door, I walk in and see Tris in his bed.

He walks out of the bathroom just as I see her lying there, upset beyond belief. Why am I so upset about this? Our relationship isn’t even real. I think, tears on my cheeks.

“How could you?” I shout at him.

“Ana. It isn’t what you think.” Tobias says, walking towards me.

I back up as he walks closer to me. “Then what is it Tobias?”

“Some of the other initiates tried to kill her last night, I saved her, and let her sleep here so she’d feel safe. That’s all Ana. Nothing more.” He says pleadingly, begging me to believe him. His arms wrapping around my waist, kissing my collarbone, his head resting in the crook of my neck.

“Yeah. Right.” I say coldly, breaking out of his embrace.

“Ana. You’ve got to believe me. Please.”

I storm out and he follows me back to my apartment.

“You’re not welcome here anymore Four. Go be with Tris like you want, I won’t hold you back.”

“No, Ana. I’m not leaving till you believe me. I would never cheat on you Ana, you know that. I love you too much.”

I start to cry really hard as he wraps his arms around my waist. I wasn’t crying just because of what he did, but because of what I was doing to him. Deceiving him into thinking I loved him, when I really didn’t. While he had genuine feelings for me.

“Ana. It’s okay, calm down. Shh…” He says, kissing the top of my head.

I wish I could tell him it was okay. That I wasn’t lying to him. That I’ve meant every word to him since we got together.

But I can’t. I can’t tell him everything was okay. As much as I wish. I would lose everyone if I did.

I just held tight to him and cried. It was all I could do.

“Is what you’re saying true? That you saved her from some initiates trying to kill her? Which ones?”

“Peter, Drew and Al.” That explains why Drew wasn’t in training.

My head jerks up in surprise. “Al? You’ve got to be kidding me. He can’t even throw a decent punch. How were they trying to kill Tris?” I smile in a confused way, scoffing.

“They were going to throw her over the chasm. Since she’s ranked first now.”

I look at him like he’d gone nuts. “First? How? What? When?” My mind running in a million different directions.

“Due to how well she’s doing in the fear simulations, she’s ranked first over everyone including the Dauntless-born’s.”

“You’re being serious?” I ask, one of my brows raised.