Not Letting Go

Chapter 17

When she woke, Max jumped up with a start and scrambled around the bed, searching with her hands. She heard a small yelp from Kate when her hands bumped into the other girl's body and had grabbed at it before she knew the blonde was there. Max wasn't awake enough to know where exactly she groped Kate, but the girl looked very red and said nothing at first.

As the final cloud of her sleepy haze lifted, Max blinked and rasped out in partial disbelief with her morning voice, "Katie...? You're still here."

Kate smiled, but the next moment there was something less cheerful behind her stare. Before she could dwell on this reminder of the current confusing state of how things were between them, Max realized what she must have just done.

"Oh god, I'm sorry, Kate! I just, um... panicked for some reason when I woke up. I think I was still a little asleep."

Kate smile became reassuring as she said, "It's okay, Max. Don't worry about it." Her face was a much lighter shade now, but Kate still turned to look away. She held a protective hand against her chest which slid all too slowly down before it was removed.

She was saying "Max" again, which was fine sometimes, and she had just called her "Kate", not "Katie", in her own abashed state, but now, whenever the blonde girl said it, the name felt very purposeful and almost forced, a reminder that things were not okay.

Kate got out of bed with a stretch, one arm extending. She caught Max staring, who turned away with a mumbled, "Sorry," and did not see Kate's pleased grin as it quickly faded.

"Let's get ready for the day. I'll be back soon," the blonde said as she started to head to the door.

Max tried to hide her startled reaction at Kate's sudden departing, but her friend saw the fear.

Kate moved back to the bed and reached out to put her hand on Max's. "I'll be back. I promise. Just let me feed Alice, practice my violin and a couple other things, like...putting on clothes that aren't PJs."

"Yeah, okay...I'll see you soon," Max said, trying to sound casual.

With a nod, Kate went to the door, gave one last smile and was gone. Max got off the bed towards her, but stopped herself as soon as her feet hit the floor.

Don't be crazy, Max. Kate's coming back. She promised.

She turned around and let her upper half fall onto the bed. As she lay there, Max thought a million things, but one of the thoughts made her stop. She crawled back into bed and lay in the spot where Kate had slept. Max pressed her face into the sheets and took a deep inhale.

Kate...Oh god, I'm doing it again. It's too late, I AM crazy.

She butted her head into the mattress to snap herself out of it. Sliding out of bed, Max then collected her things and wrapped herself in a towel to go to the showers. There was no way she was going to meet Kate's parents greasy and smelly, she thought. Right when she felt ready, there was a knock.

Max thought Kate was being overly cautious about catching Max indecent, but the girl's politeness was endearing and expected.

"Just come in, Katie!" She called from the other side of the room. A second later there was a knock again. Max crosses to open it, starting to say, "You don't have to kn-," but when she swung the door open, it was not Kate in front of her, but a man. He was clean cut and dressed semi-professionally. She froze.

He seemed to sense her confusion and said, "Sorry, to startle you miss. I'm Detective Neiman. I'm sure you got my message. Maybe you want to get dressed first so we talk can talk?" He had his badge out displayed for the girl to see.