Not Letting Go

Chapter 22

Max started down the hall, but ended up walking past her own room. She couldn't stay so close to Kate right now. Getting to the building's exit, the brunette walked out, not knowing where she was going. When she came outside, Max saw dawn had just begun and no one was outside yet, at least not nearby. She mindlessly followed a path and tried desperately to think of how she could convince Kate she would not destroy everything they had. Max thought more about it and racked her brain in agony. She realized she was not sure that she could keep her promise. She wanted to somehow save Chloe and still be with Kate. She would not let her mind think about being with her late friend, just saving her. There was no possible way to do both though without needing to redo everything with Kate and there was no assurance that all would turn out the same or even good at all. She wondered if fate or whatever it was would even let her.

When Max's thoughts became stuck, she stopped moving. She found herself standing near some trees and a figure came out behind one, startling her.

"Oh fuck, Samuel! You scared me."

"Samuel did not mean to surprise, but when I saw you I could tell you were looking for me."

"Well, not really...sorry..." Max looked around and saw they were alone. She wasn't afraid of Samuel, but some of the things he had said disturbed her. He seemed to know more than he should.

"Oh? Samuel's mistake. I am always the only one out at these early hours. You do have questions though, I can see. Something making you walk without looking, staring without seeing?"

"Yeah...I guess I'm not hiding it very well."

"I don't think you're trying to hide, you're trying to find. Max, do you know any rabbits?"

"What?" Max said shakily. He just kept staring so she answered to stop the silent gaze, saying, "Yes...Alice."

"Alice? Isn't she the one who chased the rabbit? And they both ended up in the same place. The rabbit should have just stayed and not worried about being being late. But you still have to chase the rabbit if it runs...don't you? And it's not too late for you, Max."

"Wh-wha...what?" the brunette said worried he knew her exact thoughts.

"You can still become friends with the tobanga."

This was almost more alarming. Though he mentioned it before in a past conversation, suddenly bringing it up now made it seem as if he knew her dreams, her nightmares. He continued, saying, "It's a good time, right before it sleeps and before others are awake."

"It's...alive?"

"Life is a relative term. Better you go see it and decide yourself."

She tried to hide how disturbed the conversation was making her feel. "Umm...thanks Samuel..."

"Samuel is just here to help." He started to suddenly walk off, to her relief, but turned around after a couple steps and said over his shoulder, "You know, Max, it's lucky you didn't have to choose. The squirrels were worried what you would do."

Max could only stare blankly as he turned forward again, away from her while walking back towards the main campus. When he started moving, he spoke one final sentence as an afterthought, saying, "Oh, and don't forget to meet your rabbit at the tea party." Then he was soon gone.

She thought over everything he said, and shook her head, not wanting to connect the dots and accept that he knew so much and what that would mean. She instead looked in the distance and saw it, saw the tobanga. Telling herself she would not go near it, Max still found she was stepping towards the totem. Something was compelling her, despite her fear. When she was within several yards of the the tobanga, she stopped. It was then she became aware of how rapid her breathing had become and how fast her heart was beating. She was going to turn away when she heard a voice, not anywhere around her, but inside her mind.