Long Gone [a.i]

chapter 3

#getbetterAshton

#helpAshton

Over the past three weeks, that's all that trended on Twitter. The band was more famous, now that Ashton had gotten hurt.

People thought that it was just a regular crash; a collision between two cars. That's not exactly how it went.

I had went to Ashton during his third week in the hospital. I needed answers. For the weeks before visiting him, all I did was mope and cry; I thought it was my fault he had to get a major brain surgery.

I finally went in, when he was awake, and talked to him. This is kinda how it went:

"Hey."

He looked up, his eyes dark and his skin pale. "Didn't think you'd show up."

He didn't look mad. More sad, depressed. There were large bags under his eyes, his lips were chapped, and his hair was long and knotted.

"Well, here I am," I tried to laugh, but it came out like a squeal. Ashton noticed, and the corner of his mouth peeked up. He turned his head so I wouldn't see.

"If you're wondering about what happened I'm not gonna tell you," he mumbled, turning back towards me. His bandage on his head kept his curls in, but some were just peaking out from underneath.

"Please, I need to know," I said, moving closer to the bed. Ashton glanced at me, then looked away, sitting up on his bed.

He crossed his arms across his hospital gown. He looked towards the window, his eyes sad and lowered.

All I knew was that he stopped at a friends house after the party and stayed there most of the night, doing what I didn't know, and that after he was driving home and got into that nasty crash.

"Ash, come on," I pleaded, moving a little closer to him. "I have to know. I've done nothing more than cry these last few weeks, thinking that it was my fault."

He had tears in his eyes, still looking out the window.

"I just...I need to know the story. Nobody told me anything."

Still, he looked out the window, this time a tear streaked down his cheek. A single tear that he didn't wipe away.

"Nobody told me anything Ashton!" I yelled, my voice squeaking a bit. I was getting emotional. "They kept everything from me, and it's because I did this to you. Isn't it?"

Another tear fell from his eye, and this time he did wipe it away. A few ran down my cheeks, before I could even react. I wiped them away frantically.

Without looking at me, he said, "Fine."

He finally turned to me, his eyes red and his cheeks deeply colored. His eyes scanned my face, my tear-streaked face, and then he sighed.

"I left the party crying because of the fight we got into. Yes, I was crying," he started, uncrossing his arms and placing them at his sides. "I don't like fighting with you, Lucy, I really don't."

I nodded, my eyes searching his face.

"I stopped at my friend Andrea's house, spent a lot of time there. Then, I..," he paused, searching for the words to say. "I thought of our fight again, and got really...angry. At myself. I shouldn't have said those things, and I'm sorry."

I gasped, which wasn't meant to happen. He apologized. He never apologizes.

"Then, I...well I was crying on my way home, and I swerved into the other lane and-"

His sentance was cut off by a squeak that had came from his mouth. He was getting upset.

"You don't have to tell me the rest," I assured.

"I swerved into the other lane and hit into a city bus..," he continued, looking away from me. "No one was hurt in the bus, but...,"

I thought he had paused to breathe, but really, he paused because more tears started flowing down his cheeks. He sniffled and looked away from me, wiping at his eyes. He then looked at me, and the look he gave me was heart-braking. It was pure saddness.

"I can't play anymore."

I wouldn't have heard it if i wasn't waiting for him to speak.

I glanced at his hand, and there was a bandage wrapped around his wrist. It was bent at an odd angle, and his fingers were scarred.

"It's broken..," I said, striding to his bed and taking his wrist into my hands. It was instinct, and before I had even thought about it, I grabbed his hand.

His other hand found his way to mine, and he placed it on top of my fingers. I looked up, and he was silently crying.

That's all I could get out of him that day, and that's all I needed.

XXXXXX

love this omg
so sorry I haven't been active :((