Dennise's
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Michelle, kahit hindi maganda yung samahan natin ngayong 1 and half month na ang nakalipas. Naaappreciate kita bakit? Kasi kahit gaano ka kataray saamin at gaano ka ka savage saamin. alam ko na you also care for them. For me. I appreciate you. I appreciate your flaws and edges. I think your imperfections makes you perfect. Saka those people who judge you. Don't mind them. Mas kilala mo yung sarili mo. You got yourself Michelle. At kung kaunti lang yung sinasabi mong nagmamahal sayo. Learn to love yourself. Self love means everything. That's it. Lalong sumabog yung puso ko sa bawat words na binitawan ni Valdez. Siguro tama lahat ng sinabi nya. But hindi kasi ganoon kadali. My life was fucked up since I was a kid. Mahirap. Sobrang hirap kasi bata palang ako I need to endure the pain. Everything. I need to handle it.
Baba ka nalang mamaya ha. I heard her said. When she's gone I quickly burst out my tears. Tama talaga yung iba. Dadating sa point na hindi mo na makakayanan yung sakit na meron ka sa dibdib mo. Yung sasabog ka lang bigla kasi you can't take the pain anymore. Tangina kasi life. Unfair ka.
I just closed my eyes and let go what is on my chest.
Love myself. I whispered and I fall asleep.
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It was 2am in the moring when I suddenly woke up. Ang haba ng tulog ko. I calm my nerves. I need to relax myself after what happened yesterday.
Should I join? I ask myself. Argh this one is really frustrating. I don't know anything about pageantry and it sucks kasi ako lang yung pwede magrepresent sa team nila Daddy, and fuck kasi ako lang yung babae sa team ni Valdez.
I suddenly thought of an idea.
I dialled Ella's number.
Besh. I greeted her.
The fuck Den, it's 2 in the morning. I heard her. I just chuckled.
I need your help besh. I told her and I know she's rolling her eyes right now. Parehas kami ng daloy ng dugo. You know.
Don't roll your eyes. I said and I heard her laugh.
Ano ba kasi yun? She said at napaisip naman agad ako.
You know something about pageants? I ask her at natawa naman ito ng malakas.
Damn you. Don't laugh. I said at lalo lang natawa ito.
Babe, shut up. Im tired. I heard from the other line. This must be her boyfriend, Jovee.
Oh I know what you're thinking. Shut the hell up Dennise. She said at ako naman ang natawa ngayon.
Im not saying anything. Stop denying. I said and lalo akong natawa dto.
What pageants? She shifted the topic.
You're trying to evade ha? I ask and I know mas lalo itong naasar saakin.
Shut up. She said at natawa din itp sa sarili nya. After few minutes we got back to our topic.
Besh, im joining pageant. Ms Army 2018. I told her and she just fucking burst out laughing. Tangina parang di kaibigan ah. Walang ka support support.
Tumawa ka pa. I said and she just continue laughing.
I need you here. I told her and she just stopped laughing.
