need the sun to break {a jeongchan fic}

| 17 |

jeongin walks into the library, his heart swelling up at the familiar scene in front of him.

he hasn't gone to the library in forever. not since that day when chan left. he just couldn't bring himself to step foot in the room where he experienced heart break for the first time.

but, he has a whole math project to do. and knowing his house, the library is the only quiet place he can go. so with a heavy heart, he sits down at one of the tables, pulling out his computer and notes.

»»————————««

chan stares on through the crack in the books on the bookcase. he inwardly smiles at jeongin who has just sat down at a table. he can't help but get all soft seeing the boy's small figure.

but his smile suddenly turns to a frown as he remembers what happened here. he regrets saying those things to jeongin. he regrets not telling the truth, of how he has fallen for jeongin but didn't want to.

but as chan reflects on his actions, he realizes he needed more time. needed more time to truly understand his feelings and what he wanted. he needed woojin's words of encouragement telling him that he wasn't his parents.

yes, he could've handled the situation better, but he now understands that his feelings couldn't be rushed.

and he thinks he's ready now.

»»————————««

jeongin twirls a pencil in his hand, staring at his computer screen. he solves a problem before typing the correct answer into the box on the screen.

"h-hey."

jeongin looks up, his eyes meeting those of . . . chan's.

his heart starts beating faster, but he makes sure his facial expression is neutral. he doesn't say anything, opting to give a curt nod before focusing back on the screen.

he senses chan sitting down.

"i . . .," chan hesitates. "i have something to tell you."

jeongin surges at the thought of mending his friendship with chan, but he can't help the words of caution appearing in his head.

"um." there's a pause. "can we go to a more private place? only if you want. we can talk here . . . if you want."

jeongin has to think for a bit. does he want to hear what chan has to say? will it just be an excuse?

but jeongin decides to give chan the benefit of the doubt. so he nods, placing his notes and computer back in his backpack before standing up and walking out the library. chan follows close behind.

since school is over, the hallways are mostly empty, with a couple students and teachers walking around. jeongin leans on a locker, looking at chan.

"what is it?" he asks, hands in his pockets.

chan looks down at his shoes, his heart beating at an irregular speed. he looks back up at jeongin, staring into his eyes.

"i think i've told you this," chan starts, "that my parents are divorced."

jeongin nods. he remembers chan mentioning it one day when he had completed the math homework quickly and they were just getting to know each other.

"it kind of made me scared to like someone. so when i realized i had developed . . . feelings for you . . . i was afraid and didn't want to be around you. that's why i did and said all those things. i wasn't ready to actually accept the fact that i like you."

jeongin doesn't know what he's thinking. his mind is jumbled and thoughts strewn about. but he can feel chan's sincerity. and that warms his heart.

"i understand if you don't feel the same way. i just wanted to explain things."

jeongin hesitates. "no-i-." he pauses.

what does he feel for chan? he's not sure but he knows he won't arrive at a decision now.

"can you give me some time?" jeongin asks.

"of course," chan responds. "i'll wait for you."

»»————————««

again another late update,,,,i'm sorry :((

but this book is coming to an end. two more chapters left !!

i know there won't be many chapters with them being a couple but i wanted this book to showcase how their feelings evolved for each other especially with the obstacles in their lives

<3