To Love a Monster

Chapter 10

Song:  hate u, love u by Oliva O'Brien, Don't wanna Think by Julia Michaels , Hurts Like Hell by Flurie

Flash back: 8 years 

I looked at the faces of the adults surrounding me. "What are you saying?" I felt sick. 

"Devine, Devan is gone." My mom put a tender hand on my shoulder. 

"No." I whispered. "He would never leave me. He promised." My 14 year old eyes filled with tears. My shoulders heaved. 

"I am sorry De." His mom sighed.

I ran. Blindly. I just ran away. He left me. He was going to wait. He promised me. He promised. My young heart was bleeding. How many nights had we lain curled around each other, dreaming, talking, falling asleep together, to wake up the next morning wrapped in each other's arms? How dare he use me. 

My heart, broken, bruised, and bleeding was decided. Day in and day out the thoughts of him ate me, tore me apart, hardening my soft, tender heart, leaving me cold and heartless. 

Ready to pounce.

Ready to kill.

Never trusting anyone. 

My young heart was set. He knew everything. He knew about the boys who had tried to take my innocence before him. He knew. He knew exactly what was said to me. He told me he loved me. And yet here I was. Alone. Again. 

6 Years: 

My hands shook. 

The phone in my hands threatened to fall. This was it. My in. I slowly pressed on the email. My eyes watered with anticipation. I skimmed the email and let out a whoop. 

"MOM!" I yelled. I bounded down the stairs. I was just 16,  yet they gave it to me! 

"What?" She smiled. 

"I got it." I jumped up and down. 

"Got what?"

"I'm going to L.A. to work with the prep company. I got my acceptance email!" I showed her the email. 

She smiled and gave me a huge hug. "My baby is growing up!" She smiled and I ran upstairs to pack. My dad had flights lined up and I was excited. 

I opened my Instagram to check something when I got a DM. 

Brittany: Boo, He tried to get your info from me. Fair warning. Hes trying to find you.

Me: Oh. What does he want.

Brit: No clue. Just be careful. Don't do something you'll regret. 

Me: I wont. 

I logged out and quickly turned back to packing. 

2 days later I was standing in LAX airport. 

"Miss Bennet?" A tall woman strode to me. 

"Yes." I smiled. She was slightly shorter than me, but taller than most women. 

"Welcome. I am Jane Armstrong." She chuckled when my eyes widened. "No relation to Lance I can assure you." 

"Oh." I stuttered. She smiled and helped me gather my things before leading me out of the airport to a waiting Limo. 

"Devine, you can call me Jane." Jane smiled. "Now. After we get you settled, the company is taking you shopping. If you are going to become a multi Billionaire, you need to dress like one." She smiled kindly. 

"Oh you don't-"

"We are." She cut me off. "Plus, dressing you smartly could make or break a business deal." 

"Okay." I smiled at the thought. 

She nodded and began asking me questions. 

When we pulled up the expensive pent house I gasped.  "This is yours for the next year." She smiled at my reaction. 

I walked in on my heels and tight dress trying to look calm and reserved. Then it was as if something clicked in my brain and I became the dictator. 

"Miss Bennet." My body guard reminded me of our shopping excursion. 

Jane and I went to Louis Vittion, Gucci, Vera Wang, Louboutin, Alexander McQueen, and more. As Jane and I went through she reminded me only the best. 

The one that stumped me was the amount of bralettes and panties she seemed to think I needed. 

Once home, I lay on my large plush bed reality sunk in. This was my life. This was what I was born for. To be the woman all others wished to become. 

4 years

"Devine!!!" Jane called above the noises of the Red carpet. Modeling paid off as I pinned the cameras with a deadly stare. She made her way to me and we hugged. "Darling I have someone I want you to meet." She drug me down the line to a man. 

He was strikingly handsome and had a chiseled jaw line and beautiful blue eyes. His blond hair was cut short and his designer suit straining to cover his giant chest. 

"Devine Bennet, this is Chris Evans." She smiled and then walked away.

"Devine." Chris's voice rumbled over me. 

"Hello." I smiled and he looked me up and down. 

"Would you like to be my date for the remainder of the evening?" He boldly asked. 

"I would love that." I smiled and he held out his arm for me. I took it, a slight twinge of pain, but it was time for me to let go of Devan. 

Chris and I spent the evening together, laughing and having a great time. We began seeing each other frequently there after. 

2 years

20. I was 20. Chris and I celebrated by buying a home. I was named the world's youngest most successful Multi- billionaire and model. 

We were happy. I was a success, but I still felt like he was watching. Well he should be pleased. He made me into this. He created this. My desire to please. My curiosity at what I had done, at how I could bring him back. He made me into the powerful woman I am. 

He had ruined me. My ability to trust. It took years for me to trust Chris fully. 

Chris and I were very happy ,over the moon in love. 

Present:  

Then like that it changed. He came for me. He took me. He made me into the temptress I am. He made me into a queen that could make even the king bow to her wishes and whims. 

He knows the words. The words that will bring this to a halt. He knows the words that can destroy me. He knows how to make me become fully willing. 

He knows, because he had said them once before. 

"I love you Devine. I always have and I always will. I promise to protect you and I promise I will never leave you." 

That was it. With those words he could unleash all the pent up feelings. All the hurt. All the anger. 

But he never would. Because they obviously don't mean the same thing to him. Because even though he told me them all those years ago, he would never remember. 

And I would remain forever a woman who was destroyed. A woman whom no one could touch. A woman who could never shake the feeling of loss and betrayal. 

Devan knew that. And He knew that it was slowly destroying me. Ruining my heart. Making me into the partner he needed and desired. Making me his angel and his dark queen. 

Making me the last thing that could ever possibly bring him back, but I don't know if I can. Or if I want to.